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10 Reasons You Should Definitely NOT Homeschool

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Thinking of homeschooling? Don’t do it! This tongue-in-cheek homeschool humor article explains all the reasons why you should definitely not homeschool. (But you really should!)

Thinking of homeschooling? You probably shouldn’t. No, you definitely should not. It’s too late for me, but save yourselves!! Heed these 10 {funny} reasons you should definitely not homeschool.

{Since people on the internet tend to be rather testy, I probably shouldn’t wait too long to make it clear that this is another example of my quirky sense of homeschool humor. It’s humor, y’all. Smile. There’s more in life to be upset about than strangers on the Internet.}

1. You should not homeschool because homeschoolers are weird and unsocialized.

I mean, really. Didn’t you meet your neighbor’s aunt’s cousin’s nephew’s kids? They were homeschooled and so very weird.

Homeschoolers are sheltered and isolated. They definitely never get to meet other kids at places like co-op, homeschool group outings, or, you know, in their neighborhood. They certainly won’t learn to interact with people from different age groups or backgrounds.

Our family is tarnishing the image of homeschoolers everywhere given the things we do to ensure that our kids aren’t weird and unsocialized, but we’re probably just the exceptions to the rule. Or maybe we’re too weird to recognize our weirdness.

I mean, all of my kids currently have friends. Now that they’re all homeschool graduates, all three of them are still friends with people they’ve known from back when they were weird, unsocialized homeschoolers. Life-long friendships for homeschooled kids? Who knew?? And, they’ve made new friends. It’s madness!

2. Homeschooled teens won’t get to go to prom.

They are going to miss that rite of passage. They are going to miss the singular event which is the one night that is the sum total of their homeschool experience. And, you’re going to miss out on a chance to spend hundreds of dollars for your kid to go dancing for a couple of hours. 

Your kids can’t miss prom. Don’t homeschool!

Of course, if you wanted to, you could get together with other homeschooling families in your area and organize a homeschool prom like the support group in our area does. Then, your kids could homeschool and still spend hundreds of your dollars (or not). Just a thought.

{Whispering} All three of my kids went to at least two homeschool proms each. They had a blast getting dressed up and hanging out with their friends. Memories were made. Photos were taken. Rite of passage crisis was avoided. 

3. Homeschoolers sit around all day doing nothing.

Your kids obviously will sit around doing nothing all day. Nothing. Just video games, TV, and social media all day. Like a premature 30-something living in his parent’s basement.

Or, you know, you could be the parent/teacher and ensure that your kids balance their free time and schoolwork. If your kids are preteens, you could even start preparing them to successfully manage their time so they can manage the responsibility of setting their own schedules in high school and beyond.

4. Homeschoolers are pale and unhealthy from being in the basement all the time.

Because isn’t that what the rest of the world thinks that homeschooling parents do? Just lock the kids in the basement. All day. Doing nothing but watching TV and playing video games.

Okay, so my kids really are pale – like vampires – but it’s just their coloring. What can I say? Blue-eyed gingers, all of ‘em. My boy does sit in the basement playing video games, but it’s usually at night when his – gasp – friends are online.

I make sure we all go outside once a week whether we need to or not.

When we first started homeschooling, we had a great basement schoolroom/playroom. It worked for us because my husband worked third shift and I had two toddlers running around wreaking havoc while I tried to homeschool my seven-year-old. The basement was child-proofed and far enough from my husband that he could sleep.

However, as soon as he got off third shift, we moved our whole operation upstairs and our school space just melded into our living space. Sure, a lot of people don’t have bookshelves in their dining room, but that’s okay. Homeschooling just becomes part of your life, wherever your life happens to take you.

5. You should not homeschool because you’re not smart enough.

Don’t do it! Don’t homeschool. You’re probably not smart enough.

When I met with Brianna’s teachers just before we pulled her out of public school in 2002, one of them said, “Do you really think you can teach Brianna?”

I’m still not sure which of us she intended to insult, but I will say that by the end of our first homeschooling year, my homeschooled kid was reading well – something she hadn’t managed in two years of public school – because I taught her. We went back to basics, worked at her pace, and guess what? She got it!

If you really think you’re not smart enough to homeschool your kids, you might want to reconsider sending them into the same educational system that has you questioning your ability to teach your 2nd grader.

10 Reasons You Should Definitely Not Homeschool

The average high school graduate who is willing to commit to helping his or her children learn is perfectly capable of homeschooling them.

6. Homeschooled kids aren’t ready for the real world.

Don’t homeschool your kids! They will not be prepared for the real world. They won’t get to experience mean teachers, mean kids, bullying, or any of those other things that get kids ready for life after high school.

Clearly, I’m not sheltering my kids enough. They’ve had experiences with mean teachers (some wild and crazy homeschoolers take classes outside their homes), mean kids (no, not their siblings, but I could count them), and a recent bullying experience that resulted in blocked phone numbers and social media accounts.

Rest easy, moms and dads. In today’s online world, bullies can find your homeschooled kids and get them up to speed on real-world stuff.

One really nice thing about homeschooling is that sometimes you can protect them from some of that garbage until they’re mentally and emotionally mature enough to see bullying and meanness for what it really is instead of taking it so personally or being mercilessly subjected to it day in and day out.

7. Homeschoolers are only able to get menial labor jobs.

Didn’t you know? All fast food employees are homeschoolers. That information is accurate as reported by a random stranger on Facebook who said that we need lots of homeschool grads because we need people to work at fast food places.

I read it on Facebook, so it must be true. 

I guess the homeschooled kids in my area are messing that up, too, because they seem greatly outnumbered by all the public and private school kids working at fast food places. I would think simple numbers would suggest that homeschooled kids would be in the minority in the workforce, but maybe that’s just because I’m not smart enough to understand math and statistics.

8. Homeschooled kids will never find anyone to date.

How will your kids ever find anyone to date if you homeschool?! I’m sure this is a big concern for those of you with kids in elementary school. You’ve got to start ‘em early.

Why this is such a huge concern is beyond me – especially when people are saying it to parents of elementary-age kids. 

Miraculously, my kids did manage to find people to date. Two of my three adult kids are even married. I guess I should have done a better job of locking them in the basement.

9. Homeschooled kids won’t learn how to interact with difficult people.

You should not homeschool because when people are mean to your kids, they won’t know what to do. They’ll just burst into tears and run away.

Did I mention that my kids have siblings? They also have me as a mom. They interact with difficult people 24/7, y’all. We’re failing on this one, too.

The fact is, difficult people are everywhere. They’re in the stores you shop at. They’re at the church and community events you attend. And, nearly all of them are on the roads driving. {grin}

You don’t have to interact with difficult people every single day in the confined spaces of a public school classroom where you should be able to focus on your education in order to learn to deal with difficult people 

And, the nice thing about homeschooling is that in a lot of situations, kids have loving adults to help them learn to navigate those experiences in more positive ways so that they really do learn to interact with – not just tolerate or put down – people of all sorts. 

10. You should not homeschool because you probably don’t have enough patience.

If you dare to homeschool, you’ll probably just wind up running screaming from your house all crazy-eyed with your hair sticking up all over the place one day. Nobody wants that. Don’t do it.

Again, fail. I would describe myself as having no patience, but I’ve managed to homeschool since 2002. So far, there have been no crazy-eyed escapes from the house (by the kids or me). Hmmm…weird.

Might I dare suggest that patience is a learned behavior that is strengthened by situations that make us exercise it?

Why Homeschool?

In all seriousness, I know there are people who found this article because they really were looking for someone to share all the horrors of homeschooling, but you’re not going to find that here. Yes, there are terrible instances where people abused or neglected their kids under the guise of homeschooling and I hate that. I hate that those kids had to endure that, but that’s not what true homeschooling is.

You should homeschool because homeschooling works.

Homeschooling lets you tailor your kids’ education to each one of them. If you’ve got a kid who grasps concepts quickly, homeschooling lets you give him the freedom to dig into the things that interest him instead of waiting for the rest of the class to catch up. If you’ve got a kid who needs to slow down a bit and learn in non-traditional ways, you can let him do that without feeling “stupid.”

You can let your squirmy learners squirm while they learn. Your hands-on learners can learn while they model, construct, and create. Your bookworms can read to their heart’s content.

And, a customized education is just one of many things that make homeschooling something you really should do.

Thinking of homeschooling? What fears are holding you back?

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Trish is one of the owners of Weird, Unsocialized Homeschoolers, Hip Homeschool Moms, Homeschool Road Trips and Only Passionate Curiosity. Trish is from the coast of North Carolina, but they now live in rural West Tennessee on a 40+ acre farm. She has been married to her best friend, David, for 23 years and they have three sons (ages 20, 18 and 16). She has been homeschooling since 2009 and her homeschool style leans towards a Montessori approach with a heavy emphasis on hands-on learning. Trish’s family is Messianic and they love studying the Scriptures and growing in their faith. In her spare time, Trish loves to travel, work in their garden, work puzzles, and play games with the family.

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60 Comments

  1. Okay, you make me laugh. I am, personally, a 34 year old homeschool graduate. I think I’ve experienced much all those things. I only worked at one fast food place for 3 days-I hated it. Now I homeschool my own kids.

  2. I don’t homeschool, but I do a lot of teaching myself. I send my boy to preschool so he can hang out with other kids and his entire life doesn’t revolve around me. If I homeschooled, I don’t think I would have the motivation to ensure enough play dates and def not to ensure that most things academically necessary are covered. For e.g. I cannot imagine myself teaching him an sport or a musical instrument. I would like to do what I think is fun and interesting (last 2 months we’ve been learning about CVC word building, solar system & recycling) and leave the rest to school! So really, it boils down to a parent’s motivation levels! I mean most parents I’ve noticed don’t even have the motivation to answer incessant questions their kids ask every few minutes.

    I see similar explanations given to me for “why your only kid should have a sibling”- I think the bottomline is people associate being “alone” to being “lonely”. Not going to school, not having a sibling, not having a partner seems weird because it appears “lonely”!

    Anyways, would love to see your posts in the Practical Mondays Link Up 🙂

  3. I agree with a lot of what you said. I have been doing this for 26 years now and have 6 more years to go. I love homeschooling my kids. But….let me tell you some things I have been seeing. I have been seeing that homeschool parents are not taking the education of their children seriously, like “Why would I want to read to my child or listen to them read daily….it’s so boring?” I teach at a co-op where the kid draw not nice ;pictures of me on the board–while I am teaching. They talk over me so no one can hear me. They know I can’t raise my voice due to my vocal cord injury and cancer. They don’t turn in their homework. They have played card games while I am teaching. These kids if they are lucky will get menial jobs. If they get a good job and pull half the stunts that they pull now they won’t last long. If you say that you will have to leave class and go to study hall for being disruptive they are happy with that. If you tell their parents, they tell you their kids would never do something like that and tell you that it must be your imagination that your child was playing cards in class. There are only 7 of them. I think I can tell them apart. i finally had to resign after I finish this year. I am tired of this. These kids are not taught respect. One of the parents even came into class to confront me about their child being asked to leave . In front of everyone even. Oh well. At least I know I have done a good job, but I really feel sorry for these kids and sad that no one even their parents really cares. I will still finish my 6 years. I take the education of my kids seriously and would not allow that behavior from my kids. I hope that homeschooling does not continue to degrade and I pray that it is just this group. It is so sad.

    1. That’s a shame. It seems like that is the attitude of many kids and young adults in all walks of life these days. Sadly, homeschoolers aren’t immune from increasingly apathetic cultural attitudes regarding education, respect, and hard work. Like you, I hope that what you’re seeing is not the norm.

      1. So you think ALL homeschoolers are weird? You know I am a teen, and I didn’t have a choice to be homeschooled! Stuff was happening in public school, and I was just taken out but like this is why I am so self-conscious of telling people because this is how I now being looked at in society as a weird person who has no life and I just don’t appreciate that though. I am learning probably way more than I did In public school believe it or not. I work hard for my grades you know I am not that kind of kid who can just sit around all day and do nothing because I have to get to college and finish high school. Maybe some of this is true to other kids, but It is not true to me. I mean the public school system nowadays just throws papers at kids and stacks on stacks of homework at them and tests and it’s just too much for one person to take in high school! It was ridiculous 8 hours of school then you get home and are expected to do eight more hours of school? was there ever a break for me? no, and not to mention the constant bullying and harassment in school is ridiculous ! so my opinion is that homeschooling is like public school just without kids who pester you all day long and I am free of distractions which I kind of enjoy because I can focus so much better.

        1. I appreciate your quick and passionate defense of homeschooling, Elena. I wish you had read the post in its entirety so that you would have realized that I, as a homeschooling parent, do not think homeschoolers are weird at all. Well, some of them are, just like some public or private schooled kids are weird and some adults are weird. Maybe you missed this part of the blog post: “{Since people on the internet tend to be rather testy, I probably shouldn’t wait too long to make it clear that this is another example of my quirky sense of homeschool humor. You might also substitute sarcastic (though that tends to be rude), snarky (again, more rude than I intend to come across), or ironic (as in, the literary device) for quirky. It’s humor, y’all. Smile. There’s more in life to be upset about than strangers on the Internet.}”

      2. Yes because my children behave nothing like that. Rather it’s homeschool or brick and mortar those children just sounded to have a lack of discipline and would have demonstrated that in either setting.

  4. Hola. I absolutely loved your post. Laughed out loud. I always wanted to homeschool but couldn’t so I take my son to school and do a hands-on afterschooling session daily. I believe the benefits of homeschooling outweighs any negative notion people have due to ignorance. I guess it’s just easier to bash something you know nothing about than to get educated on the subject to make an informed opinion. Again I loved it.

  5. My own husband thinks like this. Just started to homeschool my middle schoolers still trying to get the swing of it. I’m pretty sure I’m looking kinda of crazy, but I haven’t ran out of the house yet.

  6. This was great..or what our teenaged, graduating a year early, home-schooled, prom-going, granddaughter would call a “salty” article. We crack up every time someone looks worried when we mention she’s been home-schooled.

  7. My poor home schooled kid must not have done it right either. 🙁 He accidentally graduated, went to college, joined the Air Force, got married and will go to college again soon, all without ever going to public school. I just don’t know how that happened. We tried really hard to make him weird and anti-social like us but he just would NOT LISTEN! Now we are going to have grandchildren who will likely not live with us, and will probably grow up to be relatively normal, like their father. What hope is there for the future?!!? 😉 (oops, I forgot to mention he married another home schooler and still, no luck on increasing his weirdness quotient)

  8. Really appreciate this one 🙂 I feel like such a newbie, and I’m still figuring out all this homeschool stuff. Thank goodness for the blogosphere and wise homeschool parents who’ve come before me!!

  9. This post was awesome!! Thank you for educating people, while making them laugh at the same time! I love it! I’m looking forward to homeschooling my girls! 🙂

  10. Love it! Funny how uneducated people are about homeschooling. You can usually tell as soon as they open their mouth and ask that dreaded question, “How will you socialize them?”. HA! Love it!

  11. What an awesome article! I’ve been homeschooling for 17 years, graduated two of them and have 3 more to go ( one high school, one Jr. High and one in Kindergarten!) I can relate to all of that. One of the chief complaints my children have said is when other kids say they can tell they’re homeschooled because they’re awkward and uncool. As opposed to immature and rude, I guess. Thanks for sharing!! 🙂

  12. I laughed with all 10 of these! Thank you! BTW you forgot that homeschool kids can’t go to college LOL!!!
    I have 5 kiddos that I’m homeschooling, it’s a difficult job, but if God leads you to it, you do it!
    I’m so blessed to be the one who experiences the joy of my kiddos when they learn something new.
    Also after I’m done teaching all 12 grades 5 times, I should be a super genius-right lol!!!

  13. Thanks for the laughter! I especially appreciated #5. Which leads me to something else they will miss…
    Your kids won’t be taught how to think ala the public educational system. Either they might actually learn to follow ideas to their logical conclusions, or even dare to rethink the cultural norms and that would be unbearably unPC. We can’t have young people capable of questioning the system, it would make them targets and be horribly embarrassing.
    PS My kids are near vampire colored, too. Not ginger, but with lots of freckles. 😀

  14. Home schooled kids are weird. You just don’t see it. And you are most likely not smart enough to give them a quality education. But, the world needs weirdos too, so carry on!

    1. Hi, Kelly. I have to confess that I’ve never understood the appeal of seeking out complete strangers on the Internet to insult. I don’t know if it’s the satisfaction of feeling that one has “one upped” someone or if it’s that we forget that the people on the other side of the computer screen are, in fact, real people with real feelings, real families, and real lives. I always hope it’s that – that we just forget for a moment. Whatever the cause that precipitated our crossing paths on the Internet today, I don’t want to lose sight of the fact that you are a person with hopes, fears, dreams, and failures. My prayer for you this week, Kelly (I have a sister named Kelley), is that the people you encounter both online and in person treat you with kindness, dignity, and respect. I pray that you are the recipient of unexpected acts of kindness. There’s enough negativity in the world without me putting any more out there. Blessings to you and your family.

  15. Wow you are so narrow minded I personally know 3 people who were home schooled and all have very good paying successful jobs are not socially aquard and we’re more prepared for the real world than most people I know that went to public school. Every experience is different and maybe you parents sheltered you but that’s your own fault don’t out down those who are better off than you for how their families chose to raise them

    1. I’m sorry, but did you actually read the article? It states that it’s intended as a joke. I’m the homeschooling mother to three homeschooled kids – one graduate and two high school students. Part of the tagline of this site is “stereotype-smashing humor for homeschooling families.” It’s part of our family’s sense of humor to make fun of the stereotypical things that people often think about homeschoolers. You might want to read it again. I think you’ll see the humor if you do. Best wishes.

  16. I know this is meant to be a “quirky and humorous” article but you forgot to make a joke at the expense of homeschooled children who suffer abuse that goes unnoticed by mandated reporters such as “real” teachers.

    Its the dirty little secret that nobody likes to talk about.

    It happens. It happen a lot. I’m just one example of someone who that happened to and through therapy I know many, many more.

    1. I am deeply sorry for your experience and others that you know. I can’t imagine such a horrible betrayal by those who should have protected you. I pray that you find peace and healing.

    2. I was abused from parents that public schooled and private schooled. It was also a “dirty little secret”, and counseling only helped them to point the blame at me.

      Still have to seek counseling even as an adult. I also know many more that have experienced this while being public schooled.

      Please consider that there are abuses that happen for public schooled and private schooled individuals as well.

      Perhaps we need to consider the individual cases, and not just assume that it is only the homeschooled that experience these issues.

      I personally believe sin and basic human nature is at the root of the problem, and not how one is schooled.

  17. I am a homeschool graduate myself only four years prior, and I laughed until I cried reading this article. The stereotypes you talked about were spot on with my own experiences growing up.
    My extended family was always concerned that my brother and I would be socially awkward. We both preferred reading to going out with friends (which we had a mixture of, both public and homeschooled) like “normal” teenagers. My brother and I both played multiple sports, and were involved in extracurriculars like 4-H, JROTC, and a co-op group, as well as ample community service. I even attended a public school prom in my Junior year. But somehow none of this counted as “socializing”.
    Somehow I managed to survive, and have my own sewing business as well as being a writing and English tutor. I am married to a wonderful man (also a homeschool graduate), so there is proof for those who think homeschoolers will never find relationships. My brother also turned out alright, as he is in his final year at university studying electrical engineering. I’d say we both failed to fit the general public idea of weird, unsocialized homeschoolers.

    Thank you so much for writing this humorous encouragement to homeschool teachers, students, and graduates alike. We may be the minority, and like all things we have our share of failures. But we also have many, many success stories that are impossible to deny.

  18. Don’t homeschool, because you’ll have to be with your kids all day! Heaven forbid that you be the one raising them and choosing what moral values and life lessons etc. to teach them! ???? BTW, I was homeschooled throughout my entire schooling. I always had tons of friends. I never once worked in fast food. I did have several different jobs (before becoming a stay at home mom) and survived in the real world, got along with my coworkers, and got accolades from my employers. I even found someone to date, for married, and have two beautiful children that I am now homeschooling. ???? (Well, so far just homeschooling one because the other is only 18 mos. old????)

    1. That was meant to say “got married” not, “for married”. ???? PS I love your quirky sarcastic humour. ????

  19. Hello. (‘: I am only 14, so I don’t really think I should be commenting. Aha. This was actually really funny, because it is all so real. I have been homeschooled since about the age of 13, and let’s just say… it’s officially messed my life up. I am now antisocial. Pfft. Also, the standard of education that I was recieving in school is ten times better. I understand that some parents are capable of homeschooling their children, but.. I really don’t recommend it. Take my advice, from an actual kid. I don’t want others to go through the same as me. Homeschooling is completely absurd and not the answer to a bright future. Bye! (‘::

  20. Wow. My mom Homeschools me and my siblings and she is an amazing mom and teacher!! Everything in this Blog is all wrong! I have been homeschooled since I was young and I have a lot of friends, I have sleepovers, I do sports, and am not a weird, stupid homeschooled teen. No I’m not going to be working at a fast food place, and never talk to anyone. Surprisingly I talk for almost of my friends who are not homeschooled because they don’t want to talk to people or make friends. Idk what your problem is with homeschoolers but keep this stuff to yourself. You should be ashamed of yourself!!!!!!!! Would you tell my mom she is an awful person because she homeschooled?!? Well she’s not she’s better than you’ll ever be! Look at yourself!

    1. I appreciate your quick defense of your mom and homeschooled kids, Sarah. However, the offense you took was completely unnecessary. I think you must have read only the title of the post and the bold-faced sentences. Otherwise, you’d have discovered that the article was intended to be a humorous mocking of homeschool stereotypes, not homeschoolers. I am the homeschool mom to 3 children, including one graduate, and know first-hand that homeschooled kids are pretty awesome people.

  21. Don’t you have anything better to do with your life besides shaming others, and saying how they messed up their kids lives?!? My mom has done an amazing job raising me.

    1. Yes, I do. I have lots better things to do with my life – like raising 3 pretty amazing homeschooled kids and writing articles to support homeschooling parents and give them something to laugh about. 🙂 I hope you’ll go back and re-read the entire article. Tell your mom she’s done an amazing job raising a kid who’s not afraid to stand up for herself. Blessings.

  22. Completely bullcrap my son is homeschooled & he has more commom sense than the average highschool student. The article is so untrue!

    1. Thanks for your comment. Did you actually read the article? If you had, I think you would have found that it was intended as a joke (there’s even a paragraph stating that), and you likely would have agreed with most of the points. I hope you’ll go back and read the whole thing and let me know what you think. Have a great day!

  23. OK, this article is humorous BUT there really are some kids out there who are not home-school material and I’m sure I am going to get a lot of ugly comments but I am still going to give my opinion on the subject because of two situations that I personally know about.

    When my daughter was a toddler, we began to consider what we wanted to do about her schooling. Our first choice was a private school. Homeschooling was not an option because I had to work. Then, I began to hear stories about how private school kids are just as bad or worse than public school kids so we shifted our focus. We had many discussions and just decided to enroll her in public school.

    I was never bullied in school, my husband was always very popular, but I was very shy and never was with the “in” crowd. Although my school experience wasn’t what I would call enjoyable or memorable, I have also not been scarred for life by it. My daughter entered Pre-K at 4 years old at our local public elementary school. She excelled very quickly. She is an only child. She learned to share, to interact with other children, and to play fair with other children.

    When she started first grade, she again excelled. Being an only child, she had friends at school and she truly liked getting out of the house and going to school and having her friends at school. In Middle School she joined the band and played the Clarinet and was first chair in the band. Surprisingly, though she did hear bad words and see kids who were a direct reflection of their dysfunctional parents, we never heard her utter a bad word and I actually had to tell her once not to spell the word “come” a different way because she did not realize as a young teenager that this was an inappropriate way to spell it. In high school, she blossomed. She made color guard in the band and was very good at it all 4 years of high school. She had a steady boyfriend (something I was not really happy about but since I married my high school sweetheart 31 years ago, what could I say?). She was on the Honor Roll, in Mu Alpha Theta, made many friends, and took college prep courses, just a few of her many accomplishments. She enjoyed going to her Junior and Senior Proms with her boyfriend, and yes, we spent a lot of money on dresses, shoes, and photos. But it is the memories of these moments that will also be precious to me–going with her to help her pick out her dress, watching her get her hair and makeup done, and being a part of the photo shoots. She got her class ring her junior year with her high school logo and graduation year on it. She enjoyed performing in the band’s color guard at football games, as well as many competitions, and she enjoyed pep rallies with her friends before the games. She had some pretty nasty teachers but she survived them and the experience has made her stronger. She has had her share of disappointments in not getting chosen in school for certain clubs/activities, but she also learned that that is a part of life and that you do not get everything you want in life. She has learned from her teachers (and us) that she has to work hard to achieve her goals and she is independent, trustworthy, dependable, and responsible. She graduated from high school in May 32nd out of 361 with Honors and a Diploma with Distinction. Next month she will begin college to study early childhood education because she wants to be a teacher.

    Now for the bad new about the homeschooled kids that I know. My nephew had always been homeschooled. He is 2 years younger than my daughter. He began to rebel, started smoking, and so they put him in a private Christian school. When he went in, his education was not up to par, so he was put back a grade. Being homeschooled, he never had the opportunity to interact with other kids and teachers, never got to play sports in a school, didn’t have many friends, and just really missed a lot of the good experiences of being in a school environment. Now he is having trouble adjusting because he was used to being at home all the time with only his mom and siblings. His sister was homeschooled (she is a few years older) and she is bitter about all the things she missed out on–school activities/clubs, proms, an actual graduation ceremony, etc. She says she will NEVER home school her children because of everything she missed out on. I also have a friend who took her 2 daughters out of school to homeschool them and she just cannot handle homeschooling them and they are older!

    As you can see from my post, I am not for home schooling but I respect people’s decisions if that’s what they want to do. All I can say is that I am very happy that home schooling wasn’t an option for us, we decided against the private school, and that my daughter was given the opportunity to enjoy life in the public school sector and that she survived terrifically and excelled!

  24. The comeback for number 9 is lame and very inaccurate. My only child who is homeschooled has more friends than my husband and I did (and do) put together. Siblings do not really “socialize” each other (beyond being a family). Outside experiences with lots of different people do.

    Some of the most anti-social children we’ve encountered came from large families with parents who mistakenly believed they didn’t need to take their kids out because they learned their “social skills” from each other. The kids were angry around people they didn’t know well and had terrible experiences making friends on their own.

    And the above is especially a dangerous mentality for homeschoolers to have. At a community center a friend opened, a woman came with 3 kids. Halfway through the session, she had to pull her 8 and 6 year olds from the classes, because they were so freaked out being in a class with “strangers.” I’ve never seen any kids like that. It was heart-wrenching! I found out later that it was because she never took her kids out. So, no. Having siblings is not enough and it is not a good comeback if someone asks about socialization. Likewise, families with onlies can do just fine. The home environment is important, but you have to get out of that bubble regularly. The same is pretty much true for kids to flourish outside of public school as well (most public schools are terrible places for socialization).

  25. Well, for one thing, i am a homeschooled graduate living in the real world. I have a pretty damn decent job and certainly don’t work at a fast food restaurant. Not ALL homeschool graduates turn out to be low-life bums at a low end job. And, while i was in homeschool, i actually found a date from the meetups located at the local areas that events were held in. He was nice to me and we hit it off as soon as we clicked eyes. And, i wasn’t a pale kid locked up in a room playing video games all day. I was out and about with my boyfriend and actually exploring the world. And i was not taught by my mother nor my father, i was taught by online teachers who were rude and incompetent little brats that thought they were better than the students themselves. So, in regards to this post, its totally inaccurate!

    1. Hi, Samantha. Did you read the post or just the boldfaced text? I think if you would actually read the entire post, you’d find that you agree with it. You might even find it funny. You may have missed this note near the beginning of the post: “{Since people on the internet tend to be rather testy, I probably shouldn’t wait too long to make it clear that this is another example of my quirky sense of homeschool humor. You might also substitute sarcastic (though that tends to be rude), snarky (again, more rude than I intend to come across), or ironic (as in, the literary device) for quirky. It’s humor, y’all. Smile. There’s more in life to be upset about than strangers on the Internet.}”

      Have a great day!

  26. Thank you for your article. As a public school teacher of 15 years, I have always been curious about homeschooling–it has never been something I can easily wrap my brain around. I have not chosen to homeschool my children, but have had friends who have considered it and had a friend in college who had been homeschooled himself. I have nothing against homeschooling and I truly believe that the way you choose to raise your child is your business. However, I could not read this article and not share one criticism:

    Your 5th reason, “You are not smart enough” (although I totally understand this article is tongue in cheek) bothers me.

    It bothers me because I know you are being sarcastic, and your sarcasm is offensive to me. As a teacher, who has studied, practiced, graduated with multiple degrees and certifications from Ivy League schools, and to be blunt, worked my ass off in the field of education, I DO have more knowledge in the field of education than the average stay at home mom. To insinuate that anyone can teach a 2nd grader is stating that all of my work and passion and experience means nothing. Just because you at one time were a student yourself, does not mean you know how to teach successfully. That is equivalent to saying “I have been to the doctor, so I can be a doctor.” I am not saying that teachers are smarter than non-teachers, I am saying that teachers have a training and an expertise that should be respected.

    Homeschooling is a lovely idea and there are many parts to it that I can understand as beneficial, but honestly, to use the argument that anyone can do it is just plain offensive. Why are public school teachers so hated? It simply makes me sad. I care deeply for my students and work hard every day to ensure they receive an education that is fun, stimulating, well-rounded and safe. I continue to better myself and my skills through classes and through working with other educators. Teaching is a profession, not a fun hobby to dabble in so that you don’t have to ever leave your child’s side. I wish all parents could get beyond themselves and their own selfish desires to cling their children close to their chests and understand that in order to give your children wings you have to let them try to fly.

    I don’t mean for this to come across as offensive, but I just wanted to let you know that I don’t think number 5 helps build your case.

    ps. I also find it funny and ironic that that people in your comments section who do not understand your sarcasm are homeschooled students and parents…yikes…

    1. Hi, Kathleen. Thank you for your thoughtful comment. I appreciate the opportunity to have conversations with people who have a different viewpoint than I do so that hopefully, we can gain a better understanding of each other.

      I’m sorry that you were offended and took my comment as a criticism of the work you put into your own education. It was not meant as a criticism of teachers at all and should have in no way implied that teachers are hated. I absolutely respect and admire teachers. It makes me sad, however, to hear educated parents say that they don’t feel smart enough to teach their own young children. The average high school graduate should be able to help his or her own child learn to read, write, add, subtract, multiply, and divide. If a parent doesn’t feel capable of doing so, barring any learning disabilities, they should question the educational system – not teachers – who left them unable to assist their elementary-aged student.

      I do fully respect your expertise to teach a classroom full of students of varying skills and abilities. I could definitely not do that. However, I do feel fully capable of facilitating my own child’s education. Using the doctor analogy, I have jokingly told my kids’ doctor that I think parents should be given a limited practice medical license. There have been countless times when I have accurately diagnosed my children’s illness and knew exactly what medication the doctor would prescribe before doing for our appointment. That’s because I know my kids and I recognize their symptoms. Does that mean I could go in and start treating other people’s kids? Absolutely not. It also doesn’t mean that feel that I know as much as our doctor and could successfully treat every ailment my kids ever have. But I do recognize certain ailments and know how to treat them, and I would feel comfortable giving my child certain prescription medications if allowed to do so.

      I also recognize when I am not capable of meeting my kid’s needs. That’s when I defer to those with expertise in their field (the doctor, a specialist). When my oldest child struggled with math and I didn’t feel capable of explaining it any better than the text, I hired my friend, a high school math teacher, to tutor my daughter. When my son wanted to learn to play the guitar, I hired a private instructor to teach him.

      I think the average parent is capable of coming alongside their own children and facilitating their education. That should, in no way, diminish what professional teachers do. Not everyone can homeschool. Not everyone wants to homeschool. It is vital that we have qualified, capable, caring teachers.

      For the majority of homeschooling parents, the decision to homeschool had nothing to do with selfish desires to cling to our children. For us, the decision was made because the public school system was not meeting my struggling learner’s needs. She thrived with the one-on-one instruction that homeschooling allowed me to give her.

      And, yeah, it’s a little disturbing that it’s the homeschoolers who didn’t catch the sarcasm. {sigh} I’m sincerely hoping it’s because they were too busy to really read the entire article.

      I hope that this helps clarify where I was coming from and that we both understand each other a little better. Thanks for commenting!

      1. Hi Kris:

        I am just now reading this article, and had the exact same reaction to #5 as Kathleen. I too have been a public school teacher for 34 years, and have spent all of my adult life learning and growing in my teaching skills. I also teach two foreign languages which I speak, write, and read fluently, something I’m sure the average high school graduate cannot do (unless they are bi-lingual from birth and excellent readers and writers in their native language). I’m glad that you clarified what you do when your children need to be taught by someone with more expertise. I have the impression that some homeschool parents do not think this is important (just as some public school parents don’t seek extra help for their students).

        As a parent myself of a public schooled child, I know it is not terribly difficult to teach a young child to read, write, and do simple arithmetic. My husband and I supplemented our child’s education by giving her access to as many books as she could read, encouraging her to develop her artistic, musical, and athletic talents, and exposing her to people of other beliefs and cultures – all outside of the school day. She is now a highly successful college Junior at a rigorous and selective private liberal arts college. In my opinion, the key to raising competent, independent, and kind children is very involved parents who are willing to educate their children beyond what is usual and to help their children learn to think independently and with compassion towards everyone. That’s a tall order, and many parents of children both homeschooled and public schooled are not taking enough time to do this.

        I have read and heard just as many derogatory and demeaning things about public schooled children as I have about homeschooled children. The only right way to educate a child is the way that works for that individual child and family. I wish people would just leave each other alone and accept each other’s choices. Thanks for a funny article though, and good luck on your continuing educational journey.

  27. I find this really funny. I’m currently being homeschooled and some of these are very slightly true. I know it’s supposed to be a joke, but this is a little hurtful. I agree with one of the comments that 5 is a little over the edge. My mom has homeschooled me and my three siblings(my oldest sister currently studying for pre-med)and although it’s true for some, it’s not being respectful to parents such as mine. That’s all I’m going to say.

    1. I’m sorry, but I’ve read your comment and reread #5 several times and can’t figure out why it’s hurtful or disrespectful. For each so-called reason not to homeschool, I have refuted the point with facts. I hear so many would-be homeschooling parents say that they don’t think they’re smart enough to homeschool. It sounds like your parents prove my point – even if they didn’t initially feel smart enough to homeschool, they proved that they were by successfully homeschooling you and your siblings. That’s the entire point of #5.

  28. I am a homeschooler and was asked to basically defend one side of an issue, and the the other for class. I was doing it on homeschooling and was currently researching the other side of the spectrum (people against homeschooling) and find it hilarious your article was the first that came up.

    It’s great, you did a good job. now here I go, looking for some actual (probably American) angry mums ranting about homeschooling.

    Wish me luck.

  29. Oh how I love this essay! I was at a meeting last night with people who rejoice in Master’s degrees and claim that they KNOW that all homeschool families either ignore their children or abuse them. I was so frustrated that this morning I got onto the internet and typed in “Why are people ignorant about homeschooling?” and your delicious article came up!
    I was not homeschooled not do I have any children but I teach at a Christian School and have taught homeschoolers. More people than ever homeschool but there’s still a stigma that you skewered so terrifically that I wish I could print this out and put it on a t shirt.
    Thank you!!!!!

  30. I HIGHLY disagree with each and every fact. Unsocialized? I was on more field trips than I was staying at home. We DID have a prom. We have private schools. We don’t sit around all day. We don’t stay at home all day. If my parents have the desire to want to homeschool, then yes they are smart enough. If they are mentally prepared for it.

    1. Please read the article, not just the bold text. There is also a disclaimer beneath the first image that you might have missed: “{Since people on the internet tend to be rather testy, I probably shouldn’t wait too long to make it clear that this is another example of my quirky sense of homeschool humor. You might also substitute sarcastic (though that tends to be rude), snarky (again, more rude than I intend to come across), or ironic (as in, the literary device) for quirky. It’s humor, y’all. Smile. There’s more in life to be upset about than strangers on the Internet.}”

  31. I can only speak for myself, as a home-schooled teen, but this has been my experience so far,
    #1 I know many home-schooled kids that act just like public schooled kids.
    #2 I have been to prom.
    #3 I work incredibly hard to get good grades and it has taught me how to have a good work ethic. I almost always am working on Saturday and Sunday to get all my school work done.
    #4 I spend quite a bit of time outside and actually have a pretty good tan
    #5 I partially agree with you about this one. I know some Moms who are not capable of homeschooling their kids properly. My Mom, however, has a Masters degree in chemistry so she is highly capable to teach us math and science.
    #6 I know many graduated homeschoolers who have adapted easily into adult life (no bullying required)
    #7 Almost all the graduated homeschoolers I know are/have been to College. Some of them are even going to Ivy league schools.
    #8 My friends have never had any trouble finding dates.
    #9 There are tons of difficult homeschoolers. (trust me
    #10 Since Iv’e never been a Mom this isn’t backed by personal experience, but I feel like I’m a pretty respectful kid and my Mom as said of her own volition that she enjoys homeschooling me.

    I know homeschooling isn’t for everyone but I don’t think it is right to say that everyone shouldn’t. However I’d love to hear your opinion on what Iv’e said. 🙂

    1. I agree with you completely. My opinion is that you probably want to read the entire article, not just the bold-faced text. 😉 If you do, you’ll see that the article was intended to be a joke and was written by a mom of three homeschooled kids who’ve turned out pretty awesome.

  32. Wow extremely outrageous. Maybe you’re not smart enough, but I have two bachelor’s degrees and am in the process of applying for a master’s program so later I can go to medical school. I’m lucky that my husband provides for the family, so i only have a part time work from home job and I homeschool one child. She’s way smarter than she would have been if she was going to traditional school. Maybe you just don’t know what you’re doing, but don’t discourage others that would be great homeschooling.

    1. Maybe you should go back and read the article – the whole thing, including the part at the beginning where I point out that it’s a joke and the parts under each heading where I refute each outrageous statement. It’s so discouraging that so many homeschooling families jump down my throat for this article that they’d probably find funny if they’d actually read it. Best wishes in your homeschool and with your own education.

  33. “Did I mention that my kids have siblings?”

    I support people’s right to homeschool (am even one myself), but the whole argument of siblings teaching other siblings proper social behavior is baloney. All of the most poorly “socialized” children I met had siblings—homeschooled or not. In a lot of these cases, the parents totally relied on siblings to be social interaction versus adult guidance and/or outside experiences. This resulted in kids who did not do well in group situations and either bullied other kids or were terrified of them.

    Expecting your child to know how to interact well in different social situations because they have a sibling is like expecting them to be better at any other skill (math, literature, etc…) because they have a sibling. It really comes down the the experiences the parents (and other adults in the child’s life) help the child discover. Giving all kids (regardless of whether or not they have siblings) opportunities and occasional gentle guidance (when necessary) totally trumps whether or not a child has siblings when it comes to how socially literate they become. Of course, there’s other factors that should be considered (like if the child has a disability that can interfere).

  34. To be fair, a lot of these “excuses” can be legitimate—perhaps not to those of us who already chose to homeschool, but to people who choose not to.

    It can be easy-peasy when children are little, but to do it well for an extended time is a lot of work. It also can be alienating for the parents who do it. Take a look at any study about how homemaking impacts women, and it’s not hard to draw the conclusion that it’s not really children who “socially suffer” from homeschooling. In fact, the kids usually seem to be well-adjusted, but quite a few mothers (and a couple fathers) I’ve met who homeschooled for an extended time have come off as super lonely…or worse—codependent upon other people.

    This, of course, can be combatted when parents who primarily homeschool are honest with themselves about it and make it a priority to take time for self-care—and even considering re-entering the workforce or starting some kind of professional trade part-time when their kids are a bit older and more independent. I have started studying and working from while my children do their schoolwork, and it’s been wonderful for the wallet…but even better for my mind, social life, and self esteem.

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