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Asking for Help

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One big key to weight-loss success that a lot of people overlook is knowing how and when to ask for help…and, of course, actually doing it.  Sometimes it can be hard to know what you need, so you might need to watch for triggers.

Way back when, when I was on Weight Watchers, one of the leaders said she always had another family member help clean up the kitchen after meals.  Once the leftovers were put away and uneaten food scraped off plates into the garbage, she could handle the rest.  However, nibbling as she put away the leftovers was a trigger for her.

Just last week, I asked Brian on Thursday night to ask me on Friday if I’d worked out.  I’ve learned that it can be too much temptation for me to skip a Thursday or Friday workout when I’ve been consistent the first part of the week.  Both of those days, however, are important if I’m to reach my weight loss goals and I knew that I would be much more likely to work out if I knew that someone was going to hold me accountable.

It worked!  I worked out every day last week and even got in some bonus activity on Saturday when we rode bikes for about twelve miles.

Another thing I know I need is having people respect my food choices.  I don’t need someone acting as my personal diet police – that just irritates me.  I am a grown woman and, as such, am perfectly capable of making my own decisions.  If I have chosen to eat dessert, you can just assume that I have planned for the indulgence.

The flip side of that coin, though, is respecting my decision when I tell you that I don’t want dessert or I only want a spoonful.  It’s not helpful having someone say things like, “Oh, it doesn’t hurt to have a treat every now and then,” or “Is that all you’re going to eat?”  Again, I am usually making a decision based on what I’ve already eaten that day, what I will be eating, or what my activity level has been. I know what I’m doing, but I’m not always above peer pressure or guilt trips.

I encourage you to really consider what your needs are with regards to the support of friends and family.  Once you’ve pinpointed some areas, talk to your loved ones about your needs.  It’s often helpful to talk to them before the situation presents itself so that your request doesn’t come across as an accusation and so that the guidelines are in place before the situation presents itself.

What are some things you’ve asked – or need to ask – family and friends to do to help you reach your weight-loss goals?

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Kris Bales is a newly-retired homeschool mom and the quirky, Christ-following, painfully honest founder (and former owner) of Weird, Unsocialized Homeschoolers. She has a pretty serious addiction to sweet tea and Words with Friends. Kris and her husband of over 30 years are parents to three amazing homeschool grads. They share their home with three dogs, two cats, a ball python, a bearded dragon, and seven birds.

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6 Comments

  1. I am a new reader for your blog. I have not participated in the weekly weigh in because I am participating in one on Fridays. I do weigh myself most days because I do my workouts on the Wii Fit and I like to see those stamps over the dates. I would like to participate more here on your blog but I am not sure what to do. Should I keep track of my weight from Wed. to Wed. and post that here and then keep track from Fri. to Fri. to post on the other weekly weigh in??? or should I just post last Friday's results here on Wed.? any suggestions???

    As to the eating I am not very far along on my journey. I have over 100 lbs total to loose and have lost about 15 so far. I am in a different situation at home and have not learned to stand up for myself and my dieting needs. Exercise I am doing well on. Last night the kitchen was a mess… long story… and no one wanted to cook. Hubby got hamburgers from McDonald's for the kids, made himself a piece of steak that he had been saving, I gave in and ate a hamburger also. I did not want a salad!!! Oh well, we all fall sometimes. I need to be better prepared for these kinds of things. Hopefully I will do that in the future. It was my choice, but the temptation to eat fast food is still strong, especially when others around me are eating it.

  2. Debbie,

    Congratulations on your 15 lb. weight loss! That's great!

    As far as the Weekly Weigh-in goes, you can either post your Friday results on Wednesday or come back on Friday and leave your results. I used to include every week the note to just come back and add your weigh-in whenever you did yours, but I have forgotten to mention that lately.

    I know how hard those food temptations can be. I used to cook a couple of my favorite low-fat, healthy meals and freeze the leftovers in portion sizes so that I could have a quick go-to meal in a pinch. That might work for you.

    Another suggestion would be to get a kids' meal with the fruit side that most fast-food places offer now or a small hamburger and a side salad. Overall, that's still not a horribly unhealthy meal, especially when compared to the alternative.

    Hope that helps!

  3. My husband is currently working a second job at a convenient store in the evenings. Those hours when the kids are in bed and he's gone are my hardest hours. A couple weeks ago, I found myself asking him to bring me things home too often. While I also don't need the food police around, I finally asked him to tell me no. Actually, I specifically said to reply with, "No. You told me that there was nothing you could ever, ever, ever say to get me to bring home XYZ." It worked so far. 🙂

  4. Great points! I especially liked your last one about the "diet police." Not only am I working on loosing weight but I'm also a Type 1 diabetic. In fact, I love my MIL but the only time I remember being REALLY just MAD at her was when I was first diagnosed with T1 and she made a comment to me about what I should or shouldn't be eating. It still gets me a bit fired up 10 years later. 😉 Since I typically weigh every day but only mark down Wed. & Fri weights, I'll be back tomorrow to start joining up.

  5. Great points! I especially liked your last one about the "diet police." Not only am I working on loosing weight but I'm also a Type 1 diabetic. In fact, I love my MIL but the only time I remember being REALLY just MAD at her was when I was first diagnosed with T1 and she made a comment to me about what I should or shouldn't be eating. It still gets me a bit fired up 10 years later. 😉 Since I typically weigh every day but only mark down Wed. & Fri weights, I'll be back tomorrow to start joining up.

  6. I am a new reader for your blog. I have not participated in the weekly weigh in because I am participating in one on Fridays. I do weigh myself most days because I do my workouts on the Wii Fit and I like to see those stamps over the dates. I would like to participate more here on your blog but I am not sure what to do. Should I keep track of my weight from Wed. to Wed. and post that here and then keep track from Fri. to Fri. to post on the other weekly weigh in??? or should I just post last Friday's results here on Wed.? any suggestions???

    As to the eating I am not very far along on my journey. I have over 100 lbs total to loose and have lost about 15 so far. I am in a different situation at home and have not learned to stand up for myself and my dieting needs. Exercise I am doing well on. Last night the kitchen was a mess… long story… and no one wanted to cook. Hubby got hamburgers from McDonald's for the kids, made himself a piece of steak that he had been saving, I gave in and ate a hamburger also. I did not want a salad!!! Oh well, we all fall sometimes. I need to be better prepared for these kinds of things. Hopefully I will do that in the future. It was my choice, but the temptation to eat fast food is still strong, especially when others around me are eating it.

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