Making Time for Your Spouse

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This is probably a very appropriate post for the day after Valentine’s Day. A few weeks ago, you may recall, I was complaining about never having the opportunity to be alone with my husband anymore.

Well, when God answers prayer, He doesn’t mess around! It was just a day or two after that post when it occurred to me that, although it’s sometimes hard to make arrangements with the grandparents because of their schedules and such, surely with three sets of grandparents, we could arrange one night a month for a date night. And, it’s not so much that they can’t or don’t want to watch the kids. The biggest issue is giving them enough notice, which we often don’t do well because we tend to be very “spur-of-the-moment” kind of folks.

So, with all that in mind, I spoke to each set of grandparents, asking them if they would be able to watch the kids one night every three months, which would equal one date night a month for Brian and I. They all agreed that this was certainly doable. Knowing that we’ve already discussed it makes it easier to call them up at the beginning of the month and go ahead and make arrangements for a time that is convenient for them.

In addition to this, Brianna has a friend who spends the night occasionally and who babysits for her parents from time to time. While I wouldn’t like leaving Brianna alone in charge of Josh and Megan, I feel okay with her and her friend babysitting for awhile. As I explained to Brianna’s friend, her job is to make Brianna be nice to her siblings. 😉

So, all of a sudden, Brian and I have lots of options for time alone, which is really nice! As I mentioned before, I think it’s really important to guard your marriage and to avoid letting yourself get so wrapped up in the kids and homeschooling that you lose touch with your spouse.

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. – Genesis 2:24 (KJV)

So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate. – Matthew 19:6 (NIV)

What are some of the ways in which you guard your marriage?

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Kris Bales is a newly-retired homeschool mom and the quirky, Christ-following, painfully honest founder (and former owner) of Weird, Unsocialized Homeschoolers. She has a pretty serious addiction to sweet tea and Words with Friends. Kris and her husband of over 30 years are parents to three amazing homeschool grads. They share their home with three dogs, two cats, a ball python, a bearded dragon, and seven birds.

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7 Comments

  1. Thanks so much for coming, Kris. Please come back again.

    Also, if you let me know what you’re working on, (across the curriculum)I would welcome the opportunity to come up with writing exercises for you!

    Jan

  2. Kris, you are SO right!! If we don’t take the time to nurture our marriage, it will eventually kill it. I know that our marriage as improved greatly since we have made have a date night once a month (or more when possible) a priority! Thanks for the reminder!

  3. Since January it has been making a concious effort not to take out my stress/exhaustion on him when he walks through the door after an equally if different type of stressful/exhausting day.

    Also, to make time to spend with him at night. this has meant a decline blogging action- but it is well worth the effort- you get what you give and he has begun to think of me in little ways again too. Like bringing home Bounce sheets before I even realized we were almost out. It’s the little things that truly do make the difference in the long run!!

  4. Well said, great post! My husband has a job that has him on the road hours a day. So we call each other very frequently. It’s rare for us to go 3 hours without at least “saying hi”. I never thought we be “one of those couples” but after a rough patch we realized this is what works for us. We’re okay if we don’t talk regularly, but better if we do. Connecting is so important and after me keeping house (and all that comes with that) and homeschooling all day and his hectic work schedule we’re usually too tired to have important conversations in the evening. We’re thankful for cell phones 🙂

  5. Great idea to plan ahead! I tell ya, our weekly date night might consist of running errands and what not, but we really rely on the time together to reconnect – even if it is while walking through Target 🙂

  6. This is something that we have neglected but I hope to get back to soon. 🙂 It is sooo important and I miss it.

  7. You mean your husband would rather you be spending time with him than watching him blog?!? You must be mistaken! 😉 (Yeah, guilty as charged.)

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