10 things I’d change if I could have a homeschool do-over

Posted:
Aug
27
2013

I’ve had people ask me, if I could live my whole life over again would I do it in order to change things? There are good times that I’d like to relive and painful memories that I’d like to erase. There are moments in time that I would live differently if I could do so with the wisdom I’ve gained from living life.

However, all those things have happened to make me the person I am, so, good or bad, I don’t think I’d want to change anything. That being said, it’s sometimes fun to daydream about what you’d change if you could have a do-over.

10 things I'd change if I could have a homeschool do-over

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If I could have a homeschool do-over, I’d…

Focus less on academics and more on play when my kids were younger

Don’t get me wrong, academics are absolutely important…but so is play. Sometimes, as homeschool parents, we get so excited about starting school with our kids that we forget to enjoy the days when everything is new and play is learning.

Sometimes we get so worried about proving to Grandma and Grandpa or nosy Aunt Sue – or ourselves – that homeschooling is really an okay choice for our kids that we push academics too early or too hard.

Read more

Sure I read a lot to my kids and I still do. We have some favorite children’s books and I don’t regret those at all. I just wish we’d read some of the original classics, like Bambi or A.A. Milne’s Winnie the Pooh. I wish I’d have enjoyed the Little House books and Farmer Boy with all my kids instead of just Megan.

Be a little less classical and a lot more Charlotte Mason

There are some things I appreciate about a classical education, but I think that the more natural approach to learning that is Charlotte Mason would have done a better job of preserving my kids’ love of learning than the more rigorous classical style. I wish we’d had a lot more music, art, and nature appreciation and a lot less rote memorization.

Not send my oldest to public school

Our public school experience wasn’t awful, but – oh, my goodness! – the Kindergarten and first grade years are so much fun. I wish I’d had Brianna home for them. There were some learning struggles that caused frustration, too. I think they might have been handled with much less frustration at home.

Use All About Reading

All About Reading wasn’t around when my kids were learning to read, but I wish it had been. We love the spelling program, which is written based on Orton-Gillingham principals. I’ve seen enough of the reading program to know the it meshes perfectly with the spelling. I can only imagine how effective a combination that must be for struggling readers and spellers.

Create a different high school experience for my oldest

I got so caught up in what “should” be on her transcript that I sucked the fun right out of learning. We recouped a little at the end, but there were definitely some wasted years. If I could do Brianna’s high school years over, we’d focus a lot more on her interests and her learning style and a lot less on what a piece of paper should or shouldn’t say. It would have been a much better experience for both of us.

Use Trail Guide to Learning when my kids were younger

In my defense, Trail Guide to Learning wasn’t around when my kids were younger. If it had been, though, I’d have used it. Learning history through great books? Hands-on learning? Lesson plans written for me? Yeah, that’s my kind of curriculum.

Start Lexercise sooner

We wasted so many years struggling with dyslexia. Josh endured more frustration than was necessary and lost too many years struggling to read. I tell everyone, if you even suspect that your child might have dyslexia, have them take the free online screening on the Lexercise site. At the very least, you’ll know what you’re dealing with.

Josh progressed through the program so much more quickly than I expected and has seen amazing results. I wish we’d done it 5 years ago.

Be an earlier riser

Yes, I see you sitting there, in front of your computer screen, rubbing your eyes trying to see if you read that right. You did. As much trouble as I have dragging myself (and everyone else) out of bed early in the mornings, the day is so much more productive when I start early.

Honestly, I like mornings. It’s just the getting up that I have trouble with. I wish I’d just gotten us all in the habit of getting up earlier when the kids were younger.

Savor it more

That expression, the days go so slowly, but the years go so quickly is so very true. It’s hard to believe that we’re entering our 11th homeschooling year. I think, if I’d realized how fast the years were going to zoom by, I’d have at least made an effort to savor the days a bit more.

I’d have made the effort to look at the meltdowns as an opportunity to grow my children’s character. We’d have added in more of the “extras” that aren’t really extras, but, rather, part of making learning fun. We’d have snuggled on the couch more and baked more cookies. We’d have taken more walks (you know, thanks to all the cookies). I’d have made more pictures and stored up more memories because those years? They fly by.

What would you do differently if you could have a homeschool do-over?

If you’re new to homeschooling and think you could benefit from my should’ve/would’ve/could’ve moments, I now offer homeschool consulting via email. I’d love to arrange a time to chat with you.

 

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Kris

"Kris Bales is the classically eclectic, slightly Charlotte Mason homeschooling mom to three amazing kids, the Christ-following, sweet tea addicted wife to one unbelievably supportive husband, and the formerly obese, couch-potato-turned-healthy runner of a bunch of 5K races and two half-marathons."

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72 thoughts on “10 things I’d change if I could have a homeschool do-over

  1. Nita

    Oh my I’m already evaluating changes. One major change – I wish I’d started homeschooling my kids much sooner. Just started with a 4th and 7th grader. Recently graduated my oldest daughter who would’ve been considered a 10th grader (well she was if she was in public school).
    Nita recently posted..30 Days into school year 2013 to 2014My Profile

    Reply
  2. Kayra

    This is our 3rd week of homeschooling, and I really appreciate this post. I find myself getting caught in the academics and forget why we decided to homeschool (to preserve that love of learning in the kids). Thankfully my husband is the opposite of me and injects the fun into their days (he does the teaching). Thanks again!
    Kayra recently posted..We made it thru week 2!My Profile

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  3. Hannah

    My 7 year old son Kevin was recently diagnosed with dyslexia. He has been using Lexercise for a month now and is already making great progress. Thank you for promoting such a amazing resource as this is how I found out about it. My biggest homeschool regrets were going all textbook for the first two years(1st and 2nd grades) with my eldest Nicole now 15. She learned but learned so much better when we were less strict about curriculum and spent days engrossed in books and lapbooks. this is how my younger children Kevin and Tessa age 10 learn today. Nicole now a sophomore uses textbooks but not an all in one program. I made the mistake about letting Nicole’s interest in art fly last year because I was worried about transcripts. This year(and beyond) we will include art into our curriculum. Have a great rest of a school year.

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      That excites me so much to hear that your son is using Lexercise and seeing progress! I so wish I had found out about it when Josh was Kevin’s age. I feel like we wasted so many years floundering and being frustrated.

      Reply
  4. Kori

    Some thoughts on NOT getting up earlier? :) You’ve mentioned this in several posts lately. I don’t think we get up too late around my house. But my daughter is getting closer to those teen years and I see her sleeping patterns changing – she goes to bed at the same time but sleeps later. As I have been struggling with it, things have happened to remind me that sometimes sleep is best! My sister, who is very against the fact that I homeschool, even told me about an article (a “mainstream” article, not a homeschool friendly type one) that discussed sleeping patterns and needs of kids. They theorized that one reason homeschoolers do so well statistically is because they don’t have to wake up so early – they are allowed to get the sleep required for full rest, growth and even brain development! Their recommendation – especially for high school – was that schools should begin and end later to accommodate teens’ natural sleep patterns. Now, if your kids want to get up earlier then tell them to go for it! If they thrive with it then great. But if they don’t? Trust they are getting the sleep required. One day they’ll probably have a job that requires a consistent early rise and they can form the habit then.
    Also you mention getting up earlier simply to be more productive. Again, I get what you’re saying. I think it daily. But truthfully, the push for doing more in less time is culture driven. You will never have “it all” done – but our society wants us to and we feel that tug. If you truly can’t get the basics done ever (because we all have times like that!) then decide if there are some things that need to go or if some priorities need to change. (dust weekly? In utopia only!)
    But, as long as everyone feels rested when they wake (so there are no health problems to look in to) then trust your kids need the sleep and enjoy the functionality it gives you all in your waking hours. Sleepy heads aren’t productive nor can they learn.
    Those are just my thoughts. :) Love your do-over thoughts. Especially on Charlotte Mason schooling.

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      Yes to all that and my own thoughts for many years, but we’re at the point where even my kids have started talking about wanting to get an earlier start each day. Don’t miss understand: “earlier” doesn’t mean “early” the way the majority of the work defines it. :)

      Reply
    2. Sarah

      I let my littles sleep as much as they need, but I have felt a need for me to get up earlier. I don’t wake sleeping kids unless necessary because that always makes for a rotten day. However, if I am up an hour before they are, I am able to drink my coffee, read my Bible, and fully wake up before the noise of the house starts. This helps me to personally put myself in the right frame of mind before working with my kids.

      Reply
  5. Erica

    This is great! If I had a do over, I would relax and enjoy the early years more. I made them more stressful then they should have been. Like you said, trying to prove that I am doing a good job educating the kids at home. Thankfully, I relaxed but it took a couple years.

    I also would take back the times I raised my voice. It didn’t happen often but the memory of it pains me. My son doesn’t even remember, thank the Lord because if he did I would feel even worse. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as I remember it being but it still bothers me.

    I also agree with the Charlotte Mason statement. I would have started it right away. I try some of it with my kids now and they think I’m a dork, LOL. I do take them on hikes and we check out things together but I let it flow more naturally then “hey, get your nature notebooks”.. if I say something like that I get the eye roll, LOL

    Reply
  6. Teri Beard

    Thank you for your post today. My son and I have begun our homeschool journey this year with kindergarten. Reading posts such as this remind me to stay focused on what is most important – enjoying this journey and learning gradually, as learning is a cumulative process, together.

    Reply
  7. Gina

    I homeschool my daughters Kayla and Mariah who are 14 and 16. This will be our 6th year homeschooling.
    My biggest regrets (all from the 1st year)
    1) Worrying too much about socializing. The 1st year we homeschooled we were so busy it was extremely overwhelming.
    2) Reading too much. I read so much stuff about homeschooling and methods that I began to have a serious case of self doubt.
    3) Becoming too much of a teacher and not enough of a mom. This is my biggest regret. In May of our first homeschooling year when I was choosing curriculum Mariah then 11 said to me.: “I don’t want to be homeschooled anymore! I want to go back to public school even though I hated it.” When I asked why she said,” I want you to just be my mom again.” We continued homeschooling and Mariah and I mended our relationship. I am now very close with both my girls.

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      Wow, what an eye-opening comment from your daughter. I’m glad you were able to mend your relationship and continue homeschooling.

      Reply
    2. Melissa

      Yep. As a former homeschool student, this was one of the things I didn’t like about homeschooling. I missed my mom. EV-ER-Y-thing turned into an “educational experience,” even a trip to the circus. But as a homeschool mom, I see how easy it is to start acting like THE TEACHER instead of the mom. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that God put children in families, not schools.
      Melissa recently posted..Our Curriculum 2013-2014: KindergartenMy Profile

      Reply
  8. Lorie

    Thanks so much for this post! We are starting our homeschool journey with our 2 boys, ages 7 & 9, after some miserable years on public school. After talking with you at the NC book fair, we chose Trail Guide for our core curriculum. We are starting next week, but frankly, I’m scared to death! My oldest has some learning issues while my youngest is advanced. So basically, they meet in the middle. I’m thinking I need to supplement the reading and language arts and All About Spelling and Reading look interesting to me. How do you incorporate that with Trail Guide? Do you just skip those portions in TG? Again, thanks for all the inspiration. You’re definitely a confidence builder! :)

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      I hope you all enjoy Trail Guide as much as we do. I do the same thing with my younger two – meet in the middle. My middle has dyslexia, so this works well for us. Yes, we skip the spelling in TG and use All About Spelling. Hope that helps!

      Reply
  9. Lydia

    I am just beginning my homeschooling journey with my 5 and 4 year olds. I’m a little daunted by it all because I also have a 2 year old and a newborn and I have been trying to establish a curriculum to follow. We purchased some workbooks to try to pace us a little which have worked great for my oldest, but frustrated my second when he didn’t do it JUST right. How do you work through competition? My oldest is proud of how fast he is working through his book and my second is frustrated that he only gets one or two pages done at a time. It’s encouraging, however, to read some of the articles you have cited above. I am excited to DO more. We will definitely be incorporating a lot of activities and exploration into our days. Thank you for sharing. Hopefully we will be able to enjoy our journey a little more.

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      If the workbooks aren’t fun for your 4 year old, I would ditch them. I understand what you’re saying that you’re trying to establish your routine, but there are so many years ahead of you for formal learning. To have a little guy frustrated with learning so early on is counter-productive. There’s no competition in listening to Mom read or exploring nature together. As you go through their school years, though, a little feeling of competition among siblings is probably inevitable, even when you try to squelch it. I remind my kids that we all have strengths and weaknesses – nobody learns or works at the same pace. “Let each one test his own actions, then he can take pride in himself with comparing himself to somebody else” (Gal. 6:4) is an oft-quoted scripture around here. :)

      Reply
  10. Renee

    Hi Kris, I came across your site via Google. Although, I am not a mom. I am an educator. I admire your courage to admit what you wish to do over. As as educator, there are things that I wish myself that I could do over. I think that is why we call teaching an art. And as an art is takes practice and reflection to make it successfully. Thank you for sharing your wonder blog. I look forward to commenting on more posts in the future.

    Reply
  11. Gretchen

    I have a dyslexic son myself and while I don’t use Lexercise (we did Barton Reading and Spelling but right now I’m using the Toe By Toe book per another blogger’s review) I enjoyed your review on it. We are probably going to do free tutoring with the Scottish Rite in our town – they do free dyslexic tutoring if you have a diagnosis. I am so thankful for my son’s dyslexia. I was using K12 but it sucked all the joy from our day. Now I’m just straight homeschooling my son and we are slowing down and enjoying it. While we don’t do a lot of books because I have learned to do things the way he learns best – by watching videos, listening to books on CDs and having him narrate things back to me instead of writing them – I do like the Charlotte Mason approach and especially the nature study. I had a friend talk to me about Classical Conversations but I told them I am not into forced memorization of any kind. I don’t make my son memorize math facts because I have learned that if we just do them enough and take it slow he will eventually know them and we use Math U See so I don’t feel like I have to drill him with those facts. I definitely relax more. There are days that I say out loud – “relax, enjoy, relax, enjoy”. I don’t write down the lessons we need to complete for the week I just do the next thing. I have a schedule for the day but I don’t write times on it because I just “do the next thing”. That way I don’t stress. We’ll get there eventually. I want them to enjoy it way more than I want to cram information into them and dyslexia has taught me that. It has taught me to slow down. We have to slow down anyway why not enjoy it?
    Gretchen recently posted..Week in Review (a little late) – First day of school pictures (also a little late)My Profile

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  12. Kristen faith

    I was so excited to read this review. This is absolutely perfect for my daughter. I do not feel qualified tot teach her art but she never wants to take classes and feel compared to other students. This will be a perfect fit for us.

    Reply
  13. Elizabeth@Warrior Wives

    Thank you for this…I’m a rookie 2nd generation homeschooler and I have been FREAKING OUT over the curriculum I chose at the end of last year and completely rearranging. I realized my mom did “too good” of a job picking curriculum so I’ve had a paranoia worrying that if I choose something different from her, I will destroy their education (which obviously is not true). I’m totally soaking up advice from all of you veterans and slowly calming down. :) Also, I really think I may do All About Reading and All About Spelling because of your recommendation. Thanks!
    Elizabeth@Warrior Wives recently posted..How Anger Can Lead to a Healed HeartMy Profile

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  14. Lucinda @ Navigating By Joy

    What wise and loving words, Kris. My oldest is nine and I can’t get enough inspiration and reassurance like this from more experienced homeschoolers.

    It’s funny, I’m not sure I’ve ever heard someone look back and say “I wish we’d done more academics and played less”! Maybe because play IS learning, and by learning through play our children are learning to love learning … which they can spend the rest of their lives doing. It reminds me of what they say about people on their deathbed never saying “I wish I’d spent more time working” :-)

    Reply
  15. Kelly R

    I’ve been holding this one in my email until I could find the time to read it all & I stopped after the first one. I needed this today. I had a talk with my mom this morning & spent too much time justifying my teaching methods. I have a 6yo & a 4yo. First grade & pre-K. They play games, color, draw, pretend, write, and even read to an extent. I’m really proud of my girls and I think they are very smart, but we aren’t to the point where I feel certian hours of the day need to be for “work”. We sit & do worksheets together, but not every day. Most days are filled with so much “nothing” that we find endless opportunities to learn something new. So thank you for your regret, because I’m making sure it’s not one of mine!

    Reply
  16. Shelby Stallings

    I just started home schooling my youngest daughter last year in October. She was so frustrated with public school and even though she was getting a little extra help, she was hating school and feeling very dumb Her words not mine). I felt so bad for her, but I have to say that switching to homeschool was the best thing we ever did. She is an ADHD child, so she has a terrible time sitting still for to long, but she tells me when she has had enough and needs a break, and she has just made so much progress that it is truly amazing. She now loves school, loves to read, which she used to loathe, and always asks me what we are we going to do today. The change is wonderful. I am now looking into bringing my 10th grader home, but I’m having a hard time finding curriculum. It is all very overwhelming, so if anybody has any suggestions, I am totally open to hearing them.

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      It’s so wonderful to hear about the positive changes that your daughter has enjoyed. We love the Uncle Eric books for high school. I’m also a fan of Apologia for science and Teaching Textbooks for math. We love Easy Grammar all the way up through high school.

      Reply
  17. Janice Fox

    We get up now in the morning before school and take a LONG walk. That is new this year and it really helps.

    Reply
  18. Irene

    1. I would assign studies to myself, follow through, and keep records on my own learning.
    2. I would write up an annual description of progress and content for each child and the family. I never gave grades but I wish I had done some regular verbal and written assessment. I think my kids would enjoy looking back at it.

    Reply
  19. Cheryl Pitt

    Me too, with Fox. I want a do-over of his high school. I made the exact same mistake. Trying to redeem it now, but yeah, hindsight. I also was too worried about academics around middle school and completely burned him out with “school”. We’d do much more interest-led study like we did when he was younger.
    Cheryl Pitt recently posted..Silent AugustMy Profile

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  20. Belle

    All About Spelling is great! That program taught my middle daughter to read and now there is All About Reading. Looking forward to using it with my bonus baby blessing, now 2 yrs old.

    High school can be a scarry thing. My oldest daughter is in ninth grade. Wanting to do more of a Charlotte Mason approach, but am not totally. I have relaxed A LOT since she was in Kindergarten…expected so much from her.

    Thanks for your honesty!

    Reply
  21. Nunzi

    I started homeschooling my oldest at 6 years old in 1991. My fifth child is now a senior in Homeschool High School. We’ve been through so much! However, we were surprised (shocked actually) by number six last year. (I was 48!) My second daughter posted this for me and it made me laugh because I do get to do it all over again, with so much less energy! She gets to join 10 nephews and nieces in activities though, so although she’ll be an “only child” she’ll have as much fun!

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      On the one hand, the idea of really starting over makes me want to curl up in a corner and probably need some good, strong sedatives. :) On the other hand, it sounds like so much fun to go through it all again with hindsight. I bet it’s going to be a blessing for you. Enjoy!

      Reply
      1. Nunzi

        Oh, I curled up in a corner, trust me. :)
        To add experience to the conversation though, I’m now very relaxed. I have a huge library of classics, biographies and other educational and edifying books at their disposal. But mainly I find that reading to them creates readers, learning basic math facts by rote enhances their ability to do higher math later, and writing can be a natural, fun and rewarding way to create and communicate. Every student is different, and the earlier you can identify their needs the better.
        This is a great site, I’m glad my daughter led me to it!

        Reply
  22. Pamela

    A wise woman in my local homeschooling circle frequently recommends using joy as a guideline in homeschooling and family life. As I look at her 3 grown or nearly grown children who are happily and bravely out on adventures, chasing their dreams, following their interests and exploring the world, I remind myself that joy is definitely worth seeking as a long term homeschooling goal.

    Reply
  23. Meagan Todd

    Thank you so much for this honest list! Definitely one of the most helpful I’ve seen. What a blessing to have mothers like yourself sharing your hindsight with those of us just starting out. Definitely bookmarking for inspiration as I go…..

    Reply
  24. Penni

    Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. I am on my second year of homeschooling my 6-year-old daughter. I am thankful for the fun we have and we still enjoy our snuggle time. I am a big fan of Charlotte Mason. Some people question me and I find myself saying things like, “She is only 6!” I am a certified teacher and I do want her to “be on track” but her learning does not have to look the same as it would in school. Thanks!

    Reply
  25. Karen

    I love this post! I have been homeshcoling all 4 since the beginning and my oldest is a 10th grader. I want so badly to focus more o n interest-led learning for him, but I have no idea how to do that and not worry about making sure all the “necessities” are on his transcript. Don’t i HAVE to make sure he meats all of our states requirements to graduate? I am constantly saying things to him like “You have to have a science with a lab, do these experiments!” “You HAVE to be a good writer, write more!” How do I balance the interests with the requirements? Help, I at least want his second half to be less stressful. and hopefully get it right for the younger ones. :)

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      I’m approaching high school for the second time with my younger two (currently 6th and 8th grades) and trying really hard to avoid making the same mistakes again. Lee Binz has a great book (The HomeScholar Guide to College Admission and Scholarships) that offers some good, practical tips for using a student’s interests to help design their high school course work.

      Reply
  26. Chautona

    I’d do it how “Willow” was educated in Past Forward. The natural infusion of knowledge when it comes up, planning for it to come up when it won’t naturally, and making life choices that ensure things will occur and without allowing the distractions of modern living to crowd out the important things that are timeless. That’s exactly how my father would have taught me (and did to some degree) had we been isolated like that or if he could start today. It’s natural, normal, and has purpose. I love the idea. And if I have another child, I’m totally doing it.

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      Can I just say how excited that I am that you stopped by, Chautona? It’s been ages since I’ve talked to you. :)

      Reply
  27. Elizabeth

    It’s funny to read this post (which I do appreciate, btw) and see you mention “All About Reading”. My 10 yo has done great with All About Spelling, but just today I regretfully made the decision to put away All About Reading (after using it for quite a long time with my 7.5 year old, it is just not the right program for her, I have come to realize/accept) and choosing to go in a different direction that we are both excited about. So I guess I would probably say choose the reading/spelling program that is the best fit for your child; be willing to choose something different even if in your heart you just LOVE a certain program, if you realize it is not working for your child.

    (All you All About Reading folks, have fun! :) It really is a good program worth checking out.)

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      That’s very true. What works for one certainly doesn’t work for all, even within the same family.

      Reply
  28. Billie

    Your first one is the advice I give to new homeschoolers starting out. I am about mid stream with mine now and still have one that isn’t school age. I learned my lesson with the first two. I wish that I had done a lot less academic stuff when they were little and done a lot more fun science experiments, nature walks, field trips, and art projects.
    I have eyeballed the Trail guide on more than one occasion. It looks great.
    And I am going to keep in mind the advice about high school.
    Thanks for the post.

    Reply
  29. Marcia

    I am 60 years old and now looking at helping m,y daughter home school her daughter. I know I will think of more but here is what pops up. If you can afford it hire a housecleaner so you are not constantly worrying about your messy home. My husband is a doctor so now and then we have dinner between 7:00 and 8:00. Then there was play time and downtime. So bed time was around 10:00. My one daughter received a full ride for a scholarship at BSU in Idaho. The other started her own photography album designing company after graduating with a photography degree. Was it worth it. Oh yes! Every day you need to re-evaluate, that is how you keep on tract.

    Reply
  30. Dia

    I just loved this. I saw a bit of myself in so many of them…some I would do over, and others I am so happy to say I realized, changed and am doing differently now. Yeah, those first born kiddos get the brunt of it, don’t they? But in other ways, I see things my youngest doesn’t get to experience because of his birth order as well. I try to remember it’s the journey that counts, and it is different for and with each child…we just need to be paying attention and enjoying it as much as we can. Thanks for sharing.

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      I agree with what you said about the youngest, too. I have to constantly remind myself that even though I did something with my oldest, doesn’t mean that my youngest shouldn’t experience it, too. That field trip or hands-on experiment that may seem boring to me because I’ve already done it is still new and exciting to the one who hasn’t experienced it yet.

      Reply
  31. Marcy

    I was the home schooled child. My parents stopped teaching me anything when I finished the eighth grade. At age 28, I taught myself the necessary high school subjects, earned my GED, went to community college, went to a state university, graduated with a 3.5 GPA, got accepted into medical school… and flunked out due to poor study skills. What could I have been had my education been even substandard? Mine was non-existant. Where would I be in life now? I am very against home schooling because of my experience. I have felt stupid my entire life and that has done irreperable damage to my self-esteem. I am what happens when you are an irresponsible parent. Don’t home school unless you actually DO it.

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      I’m sorry that yours was such a bad experience. It sounds as if you’re far from stupid, but rather a very self-motivated, determined learner. I appreciate your word of caution. You are absolutely right that parents who take on the task of homeschooling their children should take that responsibility very seriously.

      Reply
  32. SRC

    So very blessed by your blog!!! This is our first year of homeschooling, and it has been quite the journey! We took our children out of private school after 5 years, so as I’m sure you can imagine, the transition from a traditional classroom setting has been the hardest part. We (or really, I) have struggled with finding consistency. I seem to go from being too “loosey goosey” to trying to recreate a more structured setting, which I hate, and never wanted to begin with. I’m very intrigued with The Trail Guide program! How does it compare to sonlight? We have finally figured out learning styles (kinetic, multi-sensory), and would love to know if Trail Guide would be a good fit! Thanks again for sharing your heart!

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      I’ve never used Sonlight, so I can’t really compare the two. I’m sorry. Edited to add: I shouldn’t be multi-tasking because I hit enter and realized I probably sounded rude. :) I do appreciate you reading and am so glad you’ve enjoyed the blog. The only thing I’ve really heard about Sonlight is that there is a LOT of reading. I like that Trail Guide focuses on only 2-3 readers (usually biographies and historical fiction) each six weeks. It’s doable without being overwhelming.

      Truthfully, though, I haven’t used Sonlight, so I other than that, I can’t compare the two with any knowledge or accuracy.

      Reply
  33. Crystal Dieckmann

    These are great tips and advice. We are seriously considering pulling our two oldest kids (currently 4th and 1st) out of public school, once this year is done, and homeschooling. I won’t go into all the details/reasons as to why, but I’m getting advice from several friends and acquaintances in the homeschooling community where we live, and I genuinely appreciate it all. These are great things to consider – so I, hopefully, won’t have too many regrets about decisions. I think home will be a better learning environment, but I don’t want it to be “all work and no play” either. Thank you so much for posting this, and reminding me that this venture won’t just be about teaching my children (4 in all), but about building relationships with them and just simply ENJOYING them!

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      That is a great attitude with which to go into homeschooling – making sure that building relationships and enjoy your kids don’t take a backseat to academics. Best wishes as you make your decision.

      Reply
  34. Not-so-fun

    Kris, thank you for your openness in this post. I am only in my second year of homeschooling and already have had those “I wish I would have..” moments. My trouble is that I am not a ‘fun’ person by nature and while I think my husband would be, I don’t know how to get him involved. He is supportive and likes our decision to home school, but he is otherwise aloof to the whole thing. My kiddos are little (K and 1st) and I do focus mainly on academia because, I think, I am overwhelmed with what to do if not a scheduled worksheet. Plus, I like that stuff. However, at their ages, the academia is over within an hour or two, then it’s lots of free time. We don’t live on a farm, or in the country; we live in a small suburban home with a little suburban yard…boring…LOL. I do want to have more fun with them, but I just can’t seem to ‘cut loose.’ I am contemplating putting them into public school for one of the reasons I kept them out; so their spare time is occupied, even if it’s just with standing in line or waiting their turn. Is there a book or resource on how to help “mom” be more fun :-) ?

    Thank you again for the post – great to read a “let’s get real” post!

    Reply
    1. Kris Bales Post author

      I think kids having unstructured free time is not necessarily a bad thing. It gives them a chance to think, play, invent, and use their imaginations. Have you checked out your local homeschool groups to see what kind of activities may be available to you? I wouldn’t advise filling up all their free time, but maybe having some activities lined up a couple of afternoons a week would be beneficial to you all. You might try planning an outing or field trip once or twice a month or making sure that they have access to things like art supplies or things with which to experiment. Something like a science box would probably be a huge hit with two young kids. I hope that helps!

      Reply
    2. Cici

      Great post! Thank you for sharing your experiences!
      Just a thought for ‘Not-so-fun,’ have you considered a fun “boxed” curriculum? I struggle with creativity at times & googling exciting projects etc… takes time!
      My Fathers World has been a life saver for me! Homeschooling is sooo fun!!! My 6 year old daughter retains a lot & loves learning. I’m sure there are others out there that may appeal to you (if MFW doesn’t), that would schedule your “fun” in your day ;)

      Reply

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