Y ou’ve heard them – they’re those lies people believe about homeschooling families. Okay, so they’re probably not lies so much as misconceptions. Some of them I’ve even referred to as “homeschool propaganda” before because they’re things that a few homeschooling families tried to convince me were true of all homeschooling families.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, it’s the fact that some things will sometimes be true for some homeschooling families, but nothing is ever true of all homeschooling families.
1. All homeschool moms wear denim jumpers. Um, no. Some of them do. I don’t recall ever seeing any of my homeschool mom friends in a denim jumper. Oh, wait. I think one friend might have had one once upon a time.
Denim? Yes. Jumpers? Not so much. Jeans and a t-shirt make up my wardrobe in the winter. In the summer, it’s denim shorts and a t-shirt. No jumpers of any fabric are to be found in this household.
2. All homeschool moms wear Birkenstocks with their denim jumpers. Okay, are you ready for complete transparency? In my early years of homeschooling, I bought a pair of Birkenstocks, based purely on that image. Seriously, I bought them because that’s what homeschool moms wear…and because I needed a new pair of sandals.
Those are the most uncomfortable shoes ever. I still have them. They sit beside my door and are the shoes I slip on when I go outside to get the mail or take the dogs out. Give me a good pair of New Balance or Saucony any day, thank you very much.
3. All homeschool moms get up before the sun to go milk the cows and gather the eggs in their Birkenstocks and denim jumpers. I know homeschooling moms who have cows, chickens, goats, and various and sundry other livestock. I know homeschooling moms who get up really early.
Most of the homeschooling moms I know, however, do not own livestock. They may be like me and look a bit enviously on that more self-sustaining lifestyle – or they may have no desire to have any part of that.
And, as far as that getting up before the sun part, y’all know that’s not true of all of us. Some of us are blissfully unaware that 6:00 happens more than once a day.
4. All homeschool moms have a herd of children who follow them out to milk the cows and gather their eggs, all dressed in their Birkenstocks and denim jumpers. I think, really, most homeschooling families with more than the national average of 1.83 children really prefer to just call them “children,” rather than “herd.” I think most of them are aware of what’s causing that and are probably tired of rude, insensitive comments about their family size.
The thing is, though, there are lots of homeschooling families with only one, two or three children. Really. I have honestly had people say to me, “But I thought all homeschooling families have lots of kids.”
Nope.
5. All homeschool moms, followed by their herd of children, come inside from milking the cows and gathering their eggs to bake loaves of fresh bread while wearing their Birkenstocks and denim jumpers.
I used to bake bread sometimes. In my bread machine. Too much fresh bread (with melting butter and strawberry preserves) is not conducive to weight-loss however, so my bread machine is gathering dust.
It’s safe to say that plenty of homeschooling families get up late into the morning, gather around their one or two kids, and pop some store-bought bread into the toaster to go with their bowl of processed cereal…while dressed in their PJs.
6. That herd of kids all consider each of their siblings their BFF. <—There it is! That’s the homeschool propaganda I bought into.
My kids do love each other and the older two get along really well. The younger two used to get along well, but they’ve been going through a rough patch. They are not BFFs. I do think they’ll come around and don’t let somebody outside the family try to pick on them. They will circle the wagons and stand up for one another.
There are homeschooled children who are very close with their siblings. There are probably a lot of them who do consider their siblings to be their best friends. That being said, homeschooled kids bicker with their siblings as much as public-schooled kids. I do think that homeschooling offers the opportunity to foster closer relationships, but it’s not a guarantee of sibling harmony.
7. That herd of kids gathers happily around the kitchen table, big happy smiles on their bright, shiny faces, eager to learn because they’ve all been instilled with a love of learning. <—There’s the other one.
We have been able to tailor our curriculum to what best suits each of the kids. They are all happier with their current curriculum than they have been with some of the choices we’ve tried and discarded. And, they will admit to liking the stuff we’re currently using.
However, the fact remains that most days they could come up with a laundry list of things they’d rather do than school. Many days, I could, too.
And, then, there are those rewarding times when they admit that, really, they “kind of like” school.
8. All homeschooling families are conservative Christians. Yes, mine is one of those conservative Christian families (though not always conservative enough to suit everyone, but since the only one I have to please is God, I’m okay with that).
I live in the Bible belt. The vast majority of homeschooling families I know are conservative Christians, too, but as far as homeschoolers in general go, as wide a variety of faiths or lack thereof are represented as in the general population.
9. All homeschooled kids are shy, social awkward geniuses. Once, when I took the kids to the doctor, the physician’s assistant, after finding out that we homeschooled, commented something to effect of, “Oh, you homeschool – your kids must be so smart.”
While that was much nicer than the more popular negative comments, homeschooled kids reflect the same spectrum of skills, talents, and giftings that traditionally-educated kids do. Not all homeschooled kids are strong academically.
I doubt any of my kids are ever going to win the National Spelling Bee, but they are talented in the areas in which God has gifted them. Oh, and they are so not shy – not even the boy, who used to be.
10. Homeschooled kids aren’t prepared for real life. I have thoroughly enjoyed watching the homeschool graduates that I know in real life move on to life after homeschool. Their success has been such an encouragement to me.
I’ve seen some of them go away to successful school careers. Others have moved into the workforce and are discovering how to support themselves. Still others have stayed at home to work and continue their education.
The common thread, though, is that they have all gone on to personally fulfilling, successful lives after homeschool. All the homeschooled kids that I know personally have been just as prepared for life after graduation as the traditionally-educated kids I know.
What homeschooling lies (or misconceptions) have you heard over the years?
This post is linked to Top Ten Tuesday.
Thanks for a few laughs this early in the morning.
ReneeK recently posted..The Lesson Stoney Ridge Season By Suzanne Wood Fisher Book Review
Number eight, all the way! Especially with us living in the Bible Belt, too.
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I know this was the viewpoint in the 80′s when denim jumpers were popular ;) but do people still honestly hold these opinions? Too funny.
#10? My daughter is an RN and a mommy to two whom she plans to homeschool (after years of saying she would NEVER homeschool her kids – that falls under #7, I believe).
My son is in his senior year of a computer engineering degree. (The one who said he would never go on to four more years of school is now contemplating graduate school. Go figure.) My youngest, almost 11, hates school most days….here we go again.
You made me laugh before school. Good job!
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Thanks! Glad I could make you laugh…especially before school. ;-)
I love this!!
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I love this! :D I am one of the homeschooling families of ONE! :)
I had nothing against the schools which is what people here automatically assume of me… I just felt compelled strongly by the Lord to homeschool him and enjoy my time as a mommy and raising him in the eyes of the Lord instead of the eyes of whatever is public and evident in public schools!
WONDERFUL post… and I so could never imagine me getting out of bed to milk the cows LMAO but I DO have so much respect for those that do! :D
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I sometimes get the wide-eyed surprised look when people find out I homeschool. No one really comments as such, but I’m pretty sure they are thinking something along the lines of, “but they’re so social! and normal! and get along in groups so well!” Maybe they expect more awkwardness?
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Yes, that’s probably it – more awkwardness. ;-)
I LOVE this list!!! I was homeschooled for 11 of my 12 years and this list fits EXACTLY what people thought of homeschooling. Often times when I told people I was homeschooled, you could see this puzzled look cross their face as they went down this list and none of it was true! Even at my first job, when some of my co-workers were randomly talking about homeschooling and they basically said that homeschoolers don’t get enough socialization and turn out “weird” (they didn’t use that term), I said “I was homeschooled” and then the blank stare that I got was followed by a reply of “well you’re an exception”! Now I have a 3 year old son and we’re looking into homeschooling…so I’m sure we’ll hear it all again!
Love this post!
I wrote a post similar last year at The Homeschool Post: 10 Myths About Homeschooling Families
http://hsbapost.com/2012/05/24/10-myths-about-homeschooling-families/
I think you nailed the big ones. The only one that didn’t come up was the one your blog name’s based on – that all homeschoolers are weird, don’t know how to interact, etc. We’ve had people edge away from us when we said we homeschooled – even though prior to that our kids had been playing happily with theirs.
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Oh, the dreaded denim jumper … I do own one that is actually more modern and kind of trendy-looking (no drop waist, no oversized neckline to better display my turtleneck — Ohio here). I bought it long before I started homeschooling, but it’s been safely tucked away since then to better avoid perpetrating any stereotypes. But after a recent abdominal surgery, I needed something casual to wear to a jewelry party … something that wouldn’t rub against my belly. I was forced to pull out the jumper! I’m sure you can imagine how (mentally) painful it was to go out with a bunch of non-homeschooling women while wearing that thing!
Also, you couldn’t pay me to wear Birkenstocks …. you’re right, too heavy! I have a feeling people wonder if I own anything other than my Skechers Go Walks … those feel like slippers to me!
Thanks for writing a fun post! I enjoyed this.
Bwahaha! Kris, I can hear your voice when I read this! So true. People around here are shocked to find I don’t wear a jumper and we homeschool. lol. These misconceptions are right on and what we face with people everyday. It used to bother me, now it just amuses me. Great post.
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Love it! My friend’s sister almost didn’t homeschool because she really did think #1. My friend told her she needed to meet me and all the other homeschooling moms she knows. No denim jumpers allowed!
I’m reading this post at the computer eating a bowl of cereal; the only livestock I have to care for is LacyDog! But I would seriously love to have a few chickens and a goat, and although I was a one-child homeschooler for years, I’m working on getting that big family one way or another. ;)
20+ years ago, I’d only met one homeschooling family EVER, and they were my boyfriend’s “weird aunt and uncle.” They fit all those stereotypes (except maybe the birkenstocks). I had to overcome that mental image when I decided to homeschool. I can only imagine, though, from their perspective, how hard it must’ve been back then. Homeschool is so mainstream now; even those who aren’t pro-homeschooling at least know something about it, and often do have a few positive things to say. Before that family, I didn’t even know homeschooling existed!
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The first time my brother met my homeschooled niece and nephews, he thought they were pretty weird. Because, at the ages of 7 and 9, they could carry on a normal conversation with an adult.
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This was good! I homeschool my two kids who sometimes get along well. The 4th grader doesn’t like school, and the pre-schooler wants to do school most of the time. We’ll see what happens when she actually HAS to do it! And how about sweats and sneakers? And we do have chickens, who only see me early in the morning in the winter when it’s so cold their water might freeze, like today – oh, add a sweater to the sweats for today (yes, over the sweatshirt. Quite fashionable, huh?)
I particularly like the comment that I must be so patient to be able to homeschool, because (person speaking) could never do it. Ha! They’ve never seen our house around math time ;)
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Ooooh, the patience comment! Nope. I’m a sinner like everybody else, praying daily (often) for patience and to control my tongue. No angel wings or halo here! :) Just trying to follow what I feel God has asked us to do right now, love my kids, and help them each to grow in knowledge and faith. Thanks for the good laugh!
That was my contribution to the list, too…. “You must have so much patience.” Nope. Actually, the little bits of patience I may have ever had were used up quickly at the beginning of this homeschooling journey. :)
I agree with you that these are unfair stereotypes of homeschoolers….but that image is not such a bad one…if that is the worst that could be said, I think homeschoolers are doing pretty well.
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No, not bad at all…just not as universally true as many people think. :)
Great post. Thanks for sharing. I actually had someone come to my personal page of facebook and tell me that homeschooling my little girl was just hurting her. Ugggh, yeah, okay. They are no longer on my facebook page. Being a new homeschooler, I don’t need that negativity to fill my page up.
Love this! Like Sandra I was homeschooled and my husbands family always would make comments like, “he’s so weird. He’s like a homeschool kid”. To which I would always ask, “what do you mean by that?” I would get the regular their unsocialzed, some would go as far as to say it was selfish and cruel to children. I would then drop the bomb that I was homeschooled… They’ve changed their attitudes ;). I really loved the big family one! We have a two and half, one and a half, and six month old! We always get comments about us not knowing how it happens and so on. When I was pregnant with our third I got some down right mean ones. I chalk it up to ignorance and think well it’s not like I asked you for help or your opinion so you’re welcome to keep it all to yourself!
Well…I seriously don’t do denim jumpers and Birks, although I do find sandals quite comfortable in the summer months. LOL But I DO go collect eggs in the morning and I do make fresh bread (in a machine). For some reason the kids don’t follow me outside first thing in the morning to do the chicken and duck chores (especially when it’s -2 degrees like this morning).
So I was homeschool…by a mom who primarily wore jumpers…that were (wait for it) handmade. She also dressed me in a lot of handmade jumpers. Can I just say that it was HARD for me to make the decision to homeschool my own children because it had taken me so long to outgrow that stereotype?? Lol
As far as the lots of kids thing, I met a lady in walmart one night who made a comment about how crazy we were to both me shopping so late. I remarked that it was so much easier to get it done quickly without my kids in tow, adding that I’d just had my fourth, and she replied “Oh my! You’re going to have to HOMESCHOOL!!” I honestly still don’t even know what on earth she meant by it, but it gave me a good laugh. :)
homeschoolED. Good grief. Clearly I was no spelling bee champion. :)
Love this. My niece said she wanted to be homeschooled after a conversation with my son. My sister told her “Homeschool kids don’t get recess”. lol…even in the family they think we lock ourselves up in the house and totally isolate ourselves!
Oh #8 – how wrong you are, yet how insanely persistent! For one – I may be conservative in my doctrine but I am so far from conservative in a lot of other things. I scare a lot of conservative homeschoolers.
I think that image is starting to fade though – especially in our military community. We have a high percentage of military families that homeschool and they come from all backgrounds, religions, and cultures. It is pretty cool.
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The funny thing is that I HAD a denim jumper, years before we started homeschooling. I liked it — I liked the way it looked & it was comfortable. When I started homeschooling, and I realized that some people made certain judgments about others based solely on the wearing or non-wearing of a denim jumper, I gave the thing to Goodwill.
Love your post. Thank you. I’ve been homeschooling for…well my oldest is almost 20, so about that long. I do have 5 children from 20-4 yrs, wear jeans & t-shirts, jammies @ breakfast, don’t get up w/ the sun, (stay up to say goodnight to hubby who works swing shift) I am a conservitive Christian(we do own 3 tvs, let the kids play video games & watch popular movies), my children love each other but have many moments of rivlery, kids are not shy have many friends of all ages & as for being prepared for life, that is what I’m teaching them.
Ok, I took my kids to our homeschool group’s Halloween Party last fall. I came dressed as a “homeschool mom” in a denim shirt with the ABC and rulers all embroidered on it. You know that kind? Well, another mom in our group showed up (not dressed up) in her denim jumper. EEEK! I felt somewhat bad. Thanks for the laugh, Kris.
Is it bad that that made me laugh? Um, oops! ;-)
This is a great – and very humorous – list! :)
I cringe when I think about the misconceptions I had before and shortly after we decided to home educate our kids. Forget the denim jumpers, I thought all homeschoolers dressed like Little House on the Prairie and I was sure most of the families had multiple wives too! I don’t have any idea where I got those ideas.
I do get up before the sun, but that’s because I write novels and those are the only hours where I can write with no distractions!
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I work part-time at a teacher supply/educational store and I often have customers who come in saying, “My grandchild is soooo smart for her age. What can I buy for her to encourage her budding intellect?” (Mild sarcasm here.) I always want to respond with, “How nice. My child, whom I homeschool, is an average child. They should get together.” My co-workers think it’s hilarious.
When it comes to the “your kids must be so smart” comment, I usually inform the well-intended person that my kids are average students, just like most kids. They test average, they read at average grade level, they learn all of their subjects at average grade level.
I’m quite proud of my “average” kids.
I love it! You should totally say that one of these times. I bet the reaction would make a great blog post. ;-)
I do have to say that I have also worked very hard to break the “homeschooler” stereotype among my co-workers. It wasn’t easy, especially with some who have been public school teachers.
Thanks for this, gave me a giggle. Being in Australia, I don’t think people expect the denim jumper/birkenstocks here but they do often expect the kids to be “strange”.
I have the big family (4 kids) but only home school one of them. I home school him because he is autistic (so there’s the weird bit, lol) and finds “normal” school a trial. We’d love to have chickens and I could definitely use a cow, as he drinks so much milk. I am DEFINITELY not conservative or Christian.
I do love home schooling though, as it allows me to work with my sons strengths and help him with his weaknesses, which were mostly ignored at “normal” school.
Love this post!!!
There is not, never has been, and never will be a denim jumper in my wardrobe!!
But denim jeans and t-shirts, yep that’s me!!!
Are you sure 6:00 comes more than once a day? If so I am not aware of it. ;-)
Great post!!!
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Loved this post! :)
We definitely go against many of these stereotypes, says the chick with pretty average scoring children, who likes to sleep in and listen to Green Day. ;)
Now, I did used to own Birkenstocks though, and I would like another pair. I had a hard time getting used to them when I first got them, but after I broke them in, they were the best. I had them for about 10 years before they finally fell apart.
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Funny! My husband had this stereotype of homeschoolers in his head. Believing all home educators wore gunny sacks and no makeup, he was genuinely afraid of what it would do to me. . He went along with it only because he saw “good fruit” in other homeschooled children. I dragged him to our first HS Conference back in the 90′s.
After coming in contact with many of those stereotypes, he informed me I was not going to wear “granola” clothes. Luckily, the speakers, workshops and the Lord convinced him homeschooling was a good thing.
I think I have every type of child in my home. Outspoken, shy, aggressive, smart, challenged, inward-thinkers, and extroverts! None of their personalities came from homeschooling.
After 14 years of homeschooling (with 18 more to go) I can speak confidently of our choice. And yes, I do know where babies come from, and homeschooling can be very hard – but worth ever minute of it.
ps. – my kids like to perpetuate the rumor that they have very little school work to all their public school friends!
Huh, interesting.. I live in New Zealand, and over here it’s denim skirts. And no, I’ve never seen a homeschooling mother in a denim skirt, though they are rumoured to exist. All of the others are still applicable misconceptions over here, even the Birkenstocks, which are quite hard to come by lol!
That’s funny that the stereotypes would be the same. I mean, even denim jumpers and denim skirts are basically the same thing. Hilarious.
Except here “jumpers” are what I think you call sweaters, so the practicality of a denim sweater did have me wondering, until I googled it!
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I got a good laugh out of these. I was a little confused by number 9, though, in that it seemed as if you were saying that the idea that homeschool kids are generally smarter is a myth. And where as I do believe that God gave everyone “smartness”, whether public or home schooled, I also believe that in general homeschoolers are smarter. IN THAT they are taught more truth, and taught in a way that they have more opportunity to learn. So they aren’t more gifted or have more talent than public-schoolers, but because they are taught truth instead of falsehoods, you could truthfully say they are “smarter.”
There are definitely those homeschoolers who don’t really want to or exceed at learning, though, as well as there are public schoolers who excel academically.
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