My Do-Over Moment
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Have you ever wished that you could go back in time and change something in your past? One moment? That you could have a do-over?
I’ve often thought that my do-over moment would be that day, six months into our relationship, when I tried to break things off with my high school boyfriend. He convinced me not to. I should have.
Still, if it hadn’t been for our on-again/off-again relationship, I probably would have gone away to college instead of attending school locally. That would have meant that I wouldn’t have kept in touch with a friend from high school who attended the same local college. It was at her wedding that I met my husband, so I guess the high school boyfriend moment needs to remain unchanged.
So, then, what would be my do-over moment? I’ve thought about this a lot over the last two-and-a-half years. It wouldn’t be really a single moment, but a series of moments – all those little choices that led me to become and then remain obese for nearly 16 years of my life.
I would like to do-over the moment, in my first pregnancy, when I decided to quit going to the gym three days a week like I had been. That moment each night for several weeks when I decided that I needed to drink a milkshake right before going to bed because that was “the only thing” that helped me avoid morning sickness.
Maybe it would be that moment in any one of my many weight-loss attempts where I decided to quit, instead of continuing to make the right choices that were showing steady, but slow, progress.
Often, when I run at our local track, I see young moms, with their children in jogging strollers, running or walking the track. I wish that could have been me 17 years ago. I wish I could have seen then the benefit of living an active, healthy life.
I wish that I could have taught my children healthy eating habits from a young age and that we could have spent the last 17 years leading an active lifestyle together. I wish that I wasn’t trying to undo years of unhealthy habits and inactivity in them and in myself.
I wish that I could have a do-over to go back to that moment when I decided that I wasn’t worth the time and energy to care for myself and tell the younger version of me, “You are worth it! You will be so much happier if you just invest the energy in living an active lifestyle now. Oh, and, by the way, healthy can taste good.”
This post has been sponsored by Frigidaire, but I want you to know that the words come straight from my heart. This is a message I have wanted to share for quite some time. Frigidaire wants you to know that:
The Frigidaire Gallery™Dishwasher gets dishes fully cleaned the first time, so there are no dish do-overs. Nearly half of adults admit to re-washing and/or re-drying dishes after the dishwasher cycle has been completed. To prevent dishwasher do-overs, Frigidaire® is stepping in with its new Gallery® Dishwasher featuring the OrbitCleanTM Wash Arm, ensuring dishes are cleaned right the first time.
I want you to know that am so glad that I’ve made those healthy changes to my lifestyle now…but if you’re the young mom who hasn’t yet convinced yourself to make the changes, do it. Take it from the old version of me, don’t live your life wishing you could have a do-over moment. Invest in yourself now and spend your life enjoying active, healthy days with your beautiful children instead of just wishing you had the energy to keep up with them.
Do you have a do-over moment? What would you go back and change, if you could?
I was compensated for this post as a member of Clever Girls Collective. All the opinions expressed here are my own.
Kris Bales is a newly-retired homeschool mom and the quirky, Christ-following, painfully honest founder (and former owner) of Weird, Unsocialized Homeschoolers. She has a pretty serious addiction to sweet tea and Words with Friends. Kris and her husband of over 30 years are parents to three amazing homeschool grads. They share their home with three dogs, two cats, a ball python, a bearded dragon, and seven birds.
I would have been a more confident young mother. I would have dug deeper into the Word of God as a young mom and listened to my Heavenly Father more than the worldly advice on mothering from people who meant well but often gave poor advice.
Definitely would have NOT married my first husband. I’ve regretted that since 1998. But then… not sure if I would have truly appreciated what I have now if it hadn’t been for the abuse my children and I endured…
I can’t relate to physical abuse, but I can relate to verbal abuse and a mean, controlling person. Bad relationships definitely help you appreciate the good ones. I couldn’t ask for a better man than my husband.
Wow. Just, Wow.
Thank you, Kris.
Wow…. awesome post today, Kris. 🙂
At least you decided to have your do it the right way… you could still be that unhealthy person, and you’re NOT! That is really something to be proud of — and you are an inspiration!
Thanks, Mary. I am definitely glad that I’m still not that unhealthy person — it’s definitely better late than never. And, I don’t allow myself to wallow in regret…but that doesn’t mean that I don’t sometimes regret those wasted years and wish I could redeem them.
Love this post! So many young wives & mothers need to hear this. Fitness & making the time to care for oneself is very near & dear to my heart. So glad to have found this blog. Thank you, Kris, for your willingness to share this with others!
Have I told you lately how amazingly proud I am of you?? 🙂 You are truly an inspiration to many and seeing the change in you has been FABULOUS to watch.
Thank you, friend. (((hugs)))
You’ve done such a great job with your fitness and lifestyle changes – I can tell what an inspiration you are to a lot of people!
For myself, I’d do over the moment 13 years ago where I agreed to get a cash advance on my credit card to give a loan to a relative. It was only a few thousand dollars, but it ended up becoming the gateway to a lot more debt that I’m still paying on to this day, and that has partially shaped my life by limiting my freedom to change jobs, go back to school, etc. Worst of all, it didn’t even help that person in the long run because they ended up in even bigger financial trouble later. It would have been very awkward to say no, and probably caused some friction between me and my husband (it was his relative), but I really wish I had.
Those financial regrets are some of the worst. I’ve got quite a few of those myself.
Kris, you know I’m a big fan of your writing. But this, my friend, is one of your all-time best posts.
You’ll be pleased to know that I took baby steps last week. I walked the dog in the half hour between dropping my kids off at the ballpark and the first pitch. I biked my 6-yr-old to summer school and home, instead of driving. And this post, I know, will cause me to pause as I make other choices in my life. Here’s to making healthier choices! (at least most of the time…) 😉
Your comment has made my day, Jennifer! First, think you for the compliment on my post. That means a lot coming from you. Second, congrats on those “little” (because they aren’t so little) changes that will add up to big health benefits. It’s all those little decisions that can result in lasting change and I know they’re not always easy to make. Way to go!
Kris, your post spoke for me. I wish I could tell myself at 20 (15 years & 6 kids ago!) where I’d end up with all my bad health habits. But, like you, I’m doing something about it now. I hope & pray this will be the lasting change I need!
I hope so, too. You can do it!
Kris,
I read your post this morning with an equal mixture of hope and sadness. I’m where you were, all of it, obese since my pregnancy 11 years ago, bad eating habits, a life that isn’t all it could be. I’ve begun again for time number I don’t even know how many anymore and I’m afraid of failing AGAIN! Your post inspired me. I KNOW all of this can be true for my family, too. I must succeed this time. I must. I’ve printed out this post to read any time I need a reminder of why sticking to my plan matters. It’s important for my family. It’s important for me. I needed this. Thank you!
It can be true for you and your family! I spent way too many years thinking that it couldn’t be true for me, but that was a lie that I was feeding myself. You can do it! You can make the changes you need to make. Just start and keep going. Don’t quit! Best wishes to you! Please keep me updated on your progress.
You have done an amazing job and not just in weight loss! You are a great mom, an inspiration to many, and a lovely person! The past is the past. We can’t go back, but you have done a super job of changing your lifestyle! You are beautiful!
Awww, thank you, Slyvia.
Kris, you look absolutely fantastic. That is a major accomplishment!
Thanks, Kendra.
I too wish I would have discovered how to live a healthy lifestyle before my children were born. We all struggle with our weight and my youngest has some of the worst eating habits you can imagine…and it is my fault. I started the couch to 5k training several weeks ago. It has been about ten weeks so I am a bit behind but have had to redo several days. I can consistently finish 5k but struggle with running more than 15 minutes at a time so I typically walk most of the time. We have been traveling a lot lately so it has been difficult to make healthy food choices (or at least that is my excuse). I get up everyday with purpose and determination to move forward even if I fall rather than throwing in the towel due to a bad day. Thank you for your inspiration, it helps to know I am not alone in this journey.
You are definitely not alone. I’ve seen a saying around running circles lately — “I may be slow, but I’m still lapping everyone on the couch.” Walking is nothing to be ashamed of. You’re moving. You start where you are and go from there.
Kris….lapping everyone on the couch…..LOVE IT 🙂
To all of you ladies who regret the years you spent on unhealthy lifestyles:
The fact that you’ve made changes is inspiring to anyone around you. It would have been nice if my parents had raised me with better nutrition and exercise, but back then they didn’t know any better. But several years ago they changed their lifestyles and showed me that at 50+ they are in the best shape of their lives, and the best-looking! Just watching their changes inspired me to do the same.
Another redeeming factor is that hearing your stories makes it possible for the young’ns to NOT make the same mistakes. I do regret my first 20-something years of unhealthy living, but I don’t have a family and children yet, and I will do eveything in my power to do it right from the start. Hearing your words only makes it more important!
Thank you for this! Although I am only 10 -15 pounds overweight I understand what you said here because I have been struggling to shed off this pounds but have not completely compromised to do it. After my 34’s my metabolism changed and my activity level is less. So I am starting to get active and conscious again….I have to work on my motivation. The extra weight makes me feel a little bit depressed sometimes, although I know that my value as a person comes from the Lord.
Thank you for this motivation!